Young boy, sitting in water and throwing wet sand around: I'm going to bury the beach in sand!

–Patricia Beach, Manitoba, Canadia

Overheard by: think I can say

Mom: What did that lady ask you?
Little girl, wearing “Cerveza With a Smile” shirt: She asked what my shirt said.
Mom: Do you know what it says?
Grandpa: Service with a smile.

–Cedar Point, Ohio

Overheard by: devin the artist

Little boy: Mommy, is it still morning?
Mom: No, honey, it’s nighttime now.
Little boy: But you told me it was morning five minutes ago!

–Hilton Head, South Carolina

Overheard by: Arya

Mother to child: What?! Is this writing on your arm? Oh, no…don't say you don't know! Tell me: was it a little magic elf that did this to you?! Was it?!

–Sasco Beach, Fairfield, Connecticut

Overheard by: halliefaith

Little girl: No, no, no. Mommy calls her vagina a monkey.

–St George Island, Florida

Overheard by: say what?

Mom to four-year-old son and two-year-old daughter: When that bird shits on you, I'm gonna laugh.

–Madeira Beach, Florida

Overheard by: touched by an uncle

Jehovah’s witness kid #1: Asshole!
Jehovah’s witness kid #2: Geez, Justin! We just read the frickin’ Bible! Stop talking like that!

–Santa Cruz, California

Overheard by: collin

Overweight woman chasing squirrley eight-year-old on the beach: Get over…boy! You get…boy! Boy! You lucky I can't run fast in this sand!

–Beach Boardwalk, Santa Cruz, California

Overheard by: Go Kid Go!

Ten-year-old girl to mother, excitedly: I have the right to choose!

–Royal Palm Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Penelope

Dad to buddy’s tween daughter: Susie*, can you get me another beer from the cooler?
Susie: Wow, Jerry, you’re an alcoholic.
Dad’s own tween daughter: My dad is not an alcoholic, he just drinks fast!

–Long Island, New York