Dad: It’s all about the Benjamins?
Son: Who’s Benjamin?
Dad: He’s the president on the hundred dollar bill. He was the third president of the United States. You’d know that if you were in private school like I was.
–Zuma Beach, Malibu, California
Overheard by: Danielle
Kid preparing to bodysurf a big wave: Look! I’m a bigwig!
–Misquamicut Beach, Rhode Island
Overheard by: Steve
Teen girl: He saw some girl’s boobs.
Father: Did you see some girl’s boobs?
Toddler boy: Nooo.
Father: Did you see some girl’s boobs?
Toddler boy: Nooo.
Father: Were they as big as Grandma’s?
Toddler boy: Nooo.
–Point Pleasant, New Jersey
Overheard by: hc
Toddler: Mom, we are the hermit crabs that are going to change the world.
–Monterey, California
Little boy: That’s a man’s weak spot!
Father: I don’t care how old he is. If I were you, even if he were 18, I’d punch him!
–Belmar, New Jersey
Overheard by: em-elia
Boy being changed on changing table (babbling): Bama amma bama.
Mother: Obama Obama Obama.
–Restroom, Royal Palm Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Penelope
Little girl, no longer waist-deep in ocean: Mommy, smell my finger.
–Daytona Beach, Florida
Kid #1: They put pears in my room. Did they put pears in your room?
Kid #2: Yeah, but they were horrible. They tasted like chocolate.
Kid #3: Do you mean they tasted like chalk?
Kid #2: Yeah.
Kid #1: Wait, how do you know what chalk tastes like?
–British Virgin Islands
Overheard by: A chocolate pear would be nice
