It's the Little Things that Make Suicide Worthwhile

A group of pedestrians is almost run down by several cyclists.

Girl #1: Are we walking on the bike path?
Girl #2: Yeah.
Girl #1: God, I hate us.

–Lake Nokomis, Minneapolis, Minnesota

Overheard by: Aaron Johnson

Posted on November 26, 2023
Geography, Girls, Gripes, Minnesota, Stupidity

Loss of Virginity's Contagious

[Three ten-year-old boys cycling past the beach.]Boy #1: Why you going so fast?!
Boy #2: [Missing front teeth, which makes him lisp.] Becauth he wath fucking her latht night!
Boy #3: What?!!!

–Lake Calhoun Beach, Minneapolis, Minnesota

Overheard by: They grow up quickly these days!

Posted on October 19, 2023
Default, Friends, Guys, Minnesota, Questions, Sex, Tweens, Words

There Are Black People in Minnesota?

Little black girl, as it starts to rain: It be droplin'!

–Elm Creek Beach, Minnesota

Overheard by: Life Guard

Posted on July 1, 2023
Black people, Kids, Minnesota, Weather, Words

At Least, That's What I Heard

Middle-aged guy: Nah, it’s never worth it if you don’t get laid. I mean, I could’ve gotten two hookers for that much!

–Lake Calhoun, Minneapolis, Minnesota

Overheard by: boris the blade

Posted on March 1, 2023
Man-sluts, Minnesota, Money, Sex

At the "That's What She Said" Quarterfinals

Mid-twenties gal: (shows bottle of sunscreen) Hey, hon, will you cream me?
Mid-twenties guy: (snickers)
Mid-twenties gal: What? Oh, god. You’re sick.
(guy rubs the sunscreen on her back)
Mid-twenties guy: Can you get the rest yourself?
Mid-twenties gal: Yeah, I’ll just finish myself off.
Mid-twenties guy: (snickers)
Mid-twenties gal: Oh, shut-up!

–St. Paul, Minnesota