Overweight woman chasing squirrley eight-year-old on the beach: Get over…boy! You get…boy! Boy! You lucky I can't run fast in this sand!
–Beach Boardwalk, Santa Cruz, California
Overheard by: Go Kid Go!
Overweight woman chasing squirrley eight-year-old on the beach: Get over…boy! You get…boy! Boy! You lucky I can't run fast in this sand!
–Beach Boardwalk, Santa Cruz, California
Overheard by: Go Kid Go!
Girl: I like the smell of that. What is it?
Guy: Garbage.
–Huntington Beach, California
Overheard by: zsaint
Stoned surfer #1: Sharks never attack people unless you, like, swim around with a bloody, severed leg tied around your neck.
Stoned surfer #2: Yeah, or like a severed arm or a dead monkey or something.
–Bolinas, California
Woman, to teenaged daughter: Too bad he’s a pedophile. I was going to ask him to DJ for your party.
–The Esplanade in Capitola, California
Overheard by: Katie O
Blonde: Hey, can you look at my butt? Do I have blood on my butt?
Guy: Uh, what?
Blonde: I have my period — I just want to make sure I don’t have blood on my butt.
Guy: What? Ew.
–Venice Beach, California
Overheard by: Sarah
Girl #1: Alex and I had sex here, on this beach.
Girl #2: When?
Girl #1: Last summer. We were staying at his parents’ beach house and would come out here at night and just do it.
Girl #2: Sounds fun.
Girl #1: Oh, it was. Until we saw this couple walking their dog by the water.
Girl #2: Hm?
Girl #1: It turned out it was Alex’s parents. They totally knew it was us.
Girl #2, laughing: Did they ever say anything about it?
Girl #1: Oh, yeah. His dad took me aside the next morning and told me we could have a private rendezvous one night if I wanted.
Girl #2: No way! That’s disgusting! Oh my god, what a perv!
Girl #1: Yeah, except he and his wife were going to get a divorce anyway…
–Stinson Beach, California
Teenage girl #1: To make a long story short, she was pretty pissed that they removed the wrong one.
Teenage girl #2: Yeah… But either way it was probably an improvement.
–Huntington Beach, California
Little boy standing at pier railing, looking at beach: Look, dad! I can see America from here!
–Seal Beach Pier, California
Young dude with skateboard: Yeah, so I love it out here so far. This is my first year here, I just moved from New Hampshire.
Middle aged lady in short gym shorts: Oh, that's nice… Is that in Maine?
Dude: Uh… Well, it's by Maine…(motioning) Here's New Hampshire, here's Maine.
Lady: Oh, so New Hampshire's a state on its own? Oh my gosh, I feel like I should know that!
–Long Beach, California
Overheard by: Vanessa
Man on cell: Well, I didn’t explicitly tell him to kill himself…
–Santa Cruz Boardwalk, California
