Poli-sci professor, on international military education and training: It's like going to Harvard… (class is silent) …Harvard grad school. It's really prestigious.
–UC Santa Cruz
California
Poli-sci professor, on international military education and training: It's like going to Harvard… (class is silent) …Harvard grad school. It's really prestigious.
–UC Santa Cruz
California
Middle aged woman: And, like, you can just tell he doesn't truly love her or respect her as a woman because he lets her go out like that. I mean, my husband will always tell me to put a t-shirt on under something that's too low-cut, 'cause he doesn't want anyone staring. Now he loves me.
–Malibu, California
Beach-goer: Belly rings and stretch marks really don’t go together.
–Redondo Beach, California
Overheard by: Everybody’s Ex-Wife
Guy on cell: All you have to do is suck one cock and they’ll call you a cocksucker for the rest of your life.
–Venice Beach, California
Overheard by: Harell
Gangsta teen wannabe: Damn, son, check that ho!
Little brother: Which one?
Gangsta teen wannabe: The one with the splat-tat and the muffin top.
Little brother: Daaamn!
Gangsta teen wannabe: Maybe she’ll bend over and show some slut crack.
Mom, studying tourist info: What?
–Cannery Row, Monterey, California
Overheard by: gt6driver
Surfer: It’s questions like these that you have to look to the Bible for answers. Like, what would Jesus do in a line-up like this? He’d fuck people up, that’s what He’d do!
–Shell Beach, California
Overheard by: One of the masses in the line up
Girl, drinking spiked hot chocolate: Oh my god, it's like Jesus died in my mouth!
–Arcata, California
Tourist: Hey! You guys musta cleaned up real good after all the hurricanes last year. Everything looks brand new again.
Beach attendant: Excuse me?
Tourist: Yeah, you guys did a better job than all those FEMA guys in New Orleans.
Beach attendant: We didn’t get any hurricanes on the West Coast.
Tourist: You must have better levees here then.
Beach attendant: Yeah, we have Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, and the rest of California.
–Laguna Beach, California
Guy: Why did you tell *Veronica that I had a small dick?
Girl: Because you do.
Guy: You could have at least told her I know how to use it.
Girl: You don’t!
–Discovery Bay, California
