Coworker #1: This is a weird song.
Coworker #2, listening to hip hop: You're a weird song.
Coworker #1: He sounds like a child molester.
Coworker #2: You sound like a child molester.
–Long Beach, California
Coworker #1: This is a weird song.
Coworker #2, listening to hip hop: You're a weird song.
Coworker #1: He sounds like a child molester.
Coworker #2: You sound like a child molester.
–Long Beach, California
Man, running as fast as he can across sand, screaming like a maniac: Molly! Molly! Molly!(entire beach crowd stares)
Man, running as fast as he can across sand, screaming like a maniac: Molly! Molly! Molly!(entire beach crowd stares)
Man, finding Molly sitting quietly: Oh, there you are.
–Lewes Beach, Delaware
Overheard by: maybe next time, take Molly with you
Little kid on the beach: Ew! It smells like the ocean!
–Cape May, New Jersey
Overheard by: Megan
Hobo, singing among crowd of people: Jingle bells, jingle bells, help me get drunk!
–Venice Beach, Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Just a Midwestern girl who's new in LA
Old fisherman: Don't be tanglin' your lines up with mine, son!
Younger fisherman: You want a beer?
Old fisherman: I saw a UFO fly right under that bridge one time.
Younger fisherman: You need a haircut.
–Creaky Dock, Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: Sandy Paws
Gay guy #1: Tom has such a huge dick! I swear I was walking bow-legged for three days! I think it might become a serious thing!
Gay guy #2: I know! He has such a huge dick!
–Rehoboth Beach, Delaware
10-year-old boy to younger sister: Did you get a tramp stamp?
–Pt. Pleasant, New Jersey
Overheard by: Kim
Guy on cell: I don't know, it may just be the chlamydia talking, though.
–Destin, Florida
Nine-year-old boy #1 (yelling): My penis! My penis just closed!
(pause)
Nine-year-old boy #2 (yelling): Cool!
–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Overheard by: Chandler Smith
Pissed off mom to crying sons: You're goddamned right, we're leaving and we're never coming back!
–Rye Beach, New Hampshire
Overheard by: Robin M. StPierre
