Guy: I’m coming! I’m coming! Be gentle!
–Through a motel wall, Cape May, New Jersey
Guy: I’m coming! I’m coming! Be gentle!
–Through a motel wall, Cape May, New Jersey
20-something girl: We can't make Eric a “sorry you got raped” cake anymore.
–Ocean City, New Jersey
Ghetto black girl, about Lil Wayne: Nah, I wouldn't fuck him, he too short!
Ghetto white girl: Shit, he short but I bet he know the motion of the ocean! You know he do! I'd let him in right in me, yeah I would!
–Santa Cruz, California
Drunk girl: I think I am sexually attracted to fire.
Sober girl: Yeah…let me know how that goes.
Drunk girl: It burns, but I gotta admit I love the smell of burning pubic hair in the morning.
–Gold Coast, Australia
Little boy staring at girl in bikini: But why can’t I have boobies, Mom?! I want them!
–Jersey Shore
Girl on cell: Sure, we can get together tonight… that sounds good… I won’t do that! Are you TRYING to put my vagina in danger?
–Rockaway Beach, Brooklyn, New York
Girl on cell: Sure, we can get together tonight… that sounds good… I won’t do that! Are you TRYING to put my vagina in danger?
–Rockaway Beach, Brooklyn, New York
Mid-twenties gal: (shows bottle of sunscreen) Hey, hon, will you cream me?
Mid-twenties guy: (snickers)
Mid-twenties gal: What? Oh, god. You’re sick.
(guy rubs the sunscreen on her back)
Mid-twenties guy: Can you get the rest yourself?
Mid-twenties gal: Yeah, I’ll just finish myself off.
Mid-twenties guy: (snickers)
Mid-twenties gal: Oh, shut-up!
–St. Paul, Minnesota
Teen male #1: I just saw two lesbians kissing in the water.
Teen male #2: What? Why didn't you take a fucking picture?
Teen male #1: Right, I forgot to take my camera phone with me while diving into the water…
–North Crete, Greece
Man at parents’ 25th wedding anniversary party: Without my parents, I don’t know where I’d be today.
Random guest: In a Kleenex!
–Party boat, Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
Overheard by: Big Larry
