Ten-year-old girl to mother, excitedly: I have the right to choose!
–Royal Palm Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Penelope
Long Island wife: Shawn! Shawn, you idiot, your son wants to come swimming with you!
Long Island husband: Did you just call me an idiot?
[A fight erupts and wife is so upset she starts packing.]Long Island husband: What are you doing? You said you wanted to go to the beach today!
Long Island wife: We’ve been to the beach, and the beach fucking sucks!
–West Palm Beach, Florida
Overheard by: sat near them on the plane going home two days later, too
Police officer: You’re under arrest for underage drinking in public.
American teen: But they’re from Canada, officer!
Police officer: Got any marijuana in your purse?
–Sandestin, Florida
Overheard by: proudcanadian
Four-year-old boy scampering on shore: She’s got crabs! She’s got crabs! She’s got crabs!
Mom wading in water: Stop saying that!
Four-year-old boy: But you do… They’re all over down there!
–Sharky’s Beach, Port Charlotte, Florida
Bag lady: Weren't you gonna wash yo' hair?
Hobo: That was las' week!
Bag lady: Well, didja?
Hobo: No.
–Miami, Florida
Overheard by: larry
Gay boy 1: No! I will not tell people you have herpes when you don't!
Gay boy 2: Fine, whatever! Only a real friend would, anyway!
–Boca Raton, Florida
Overheard by: Michael
40-year-old woman to friend: Yeah, they told me I can only have solid liquids for a week.
–Miami Beach, Florida
Drunk hobo to group of gay guys: That's why I love South Beach. It's gay, gay, gay!
–Lincoln Road, Florida
Overheard by: David
Blonde: I just can’t believe Justin Timberlake can dance like that!
Black guy: I can. It’s 2007 — brothers are intelligent and white girls got booty.
–Venice Beach, Florida
Overheard by: slamber
