White girl to black friend: Why do black people wear colored skinny jeans?
Black girl: So when it's dark you can see them.
–Tampa, Florida
White girl to black friend: Why do black people wear colored skinny jeans?
Black girl: So when it's dark you can see them.
–Tampa, Florida
Customer: Hey, my car is making a funny noise.
Clerk: What did it sound like?
Customer: Vrummm-clunk.
Clerk: How did it go, again?
Customer: Vrummm-clunk.
Clerk: I didn’t quite get that — one more time?
Customer: Vrummm-clunk! Vrummm-clunk! Vrummm-clunk!
Clerk: Hahahaha!
Customer: What?
–AutoZone, Crestview, Florida
Redneck spring breaker ordering from ceviche stand: Lemme try some of that shave-ice.
–South Beach, Miami, Florida
Overheard by: Bet he didn’t like it
Woman #1: Honey, I think I need a bigger size. Somethin’ to hold some considerable inches…What did you get?
Woman #2: A twelve.
Woman #1: Ooh, I don’t have that many inches.
Woman #2: Bitch.
–Swim Shop, Passagrille, Florida
Boy with pretty eyes: So I told her “porch monkey” is a racial slur.
Girl with squinty eyes: Yeah?
Boy with pretty eyes: And she says she doesn't know anybody named Rachel.
Girl with squinty eyes: Yes she does, her cousin's name is Rachel.
–St. Pete Beach, Florida
Boy being changed on changing table (babbling): Bama amma bama.
Mother: Obama Obama Obama.
–Restroom, Royal Palm Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Penelope
Little girl, no longer waist-deep in ocean: Mommy, smell my finger.
–Daytona Beach, Florida
Girl: I'm really allergic to bugs, so that's why I'm scared of jellyfish.
–Destin, Florida
Overheard by: right, because jellyfish are just really big bugs
Angry old lady in motorchair: Where the hell have you been?! I’ve been all over this side of the lake, on the ferry, to the other side and back across here lookin’ for you!
Bewildered old man in motorchair: I was over there lookin’ for you.
Angry old lady: Whatever! Just come on! [Speeds off.]Bewildered old man, scared: But wait for me!
–Epcot’s International Village, Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: bakerchica
