California

Blonde #1: Are you wearing that sunscreen that tastes good?
Blonde #2: What?
Blonde #1: Your sunscreen smells really good. Is it the kind that tastes good?
Blonde #2: How do you know how sunscreen tastes?
Blonde #1: Oh, I’ll tell you later.

–Natural Bridges, Santa Cruz, California

Overheard by: just trying to get a tan

20-something girl, talking about new guy she's dating: Yeah, he's kind of indie.
20-something guy: So is his dick dark brown?
20-something girl, after a long pause: Not Indian! Indie!

–Santa Monica, California

Overheard by: Josh M.

Six-year-old girl (about book on Obama): That's our new President!
Teen: Yeah, do you know what his name is?
Six-year-old girl: Martin Luther King!

–Huntington Beach, California

Overheard by: tori

Girl #1: I don’t get it — I’m in a sweater and I’m cold, but you aren’t and you’re wearing a tank top?
Girl #2: That’s because I’m fat.
Girl #1: Oh… Well, at least you’re honest!

–San Diego, California

Overheard by: Leah

Activist #1: Hey girls, want to save the world together?
Girl #1: Ummmm…
Activist #2: Do you like our planet?
Girl #2: Eh, I've been to better. Thanks, but no thanks.

–Seal Beach, California

Ghetto black girl, about Lil Wayne: Nah, I wouldn't fuck him, he too short!
Ghetto white girl: Shit, he short but I bet he know the motion of the ocean! You know he do! I'd let him in right in me, yeah I would!

–Santa Cruz, California

White guy to Asian girl made up like Thai hooker: Hey, are you waiting for me?

–Santa Monica Pier, California

Overheard by: Ann

Chick: I can’t stand it when people smoke at the beach. It’s such a wrong thing to do in a place like this.
Dude: Smoking at the beach is like killing someone at a birthday party.

–Long Beach, California

Overheard by: Peter

Male: Your kid is eating the sunscreen.
Female: It's okay, he's bright on the inside. It's good for him.

–Pacific Beach, California

Girl (pointing to sign on lifeguard tower): Hah! I thought that said “Dying is dangerous and prohibited” for a sec.
Guy: You're crazy. It says “diving!”
Girl: (pause) I know. But.. oh, whatever.
Lifeguard: Yes–we have a very strict policy… No dying!

–Corona Del Mar Beach, California

Overheard by: Dee