58-year-old woman: I executed 23 successful ops in my Utopia game last night.

–Holden Beach, North Carolina

Guy #1: Hey, man! What’s up?
Guy #2: You don’t return my calls…
Guy #1: I don’t return your Facebook messages.

–Woodbine Beach, Toronto, Ontario, Canadia

Overheard by: Kaley

Teenage boy #1: Yeah, Verizon is supposed to get a 4G network sometime soon.
Teenage boy #2: Do you even know what 4G means?
Teenage boy #1: 4 dimensions! Duh!

–Granite Bay, California

Overheard by: AB

Old woman #1: So did you get that dirty book I was talking about?
Old woman #2: No, I couldn't find it. They don't sell them at Barnes and Noble. I have to look on Amazon.
Old woman #1: The one I read is really graphic. This girl is this room, watching two people doing it.
Old woman #2: Yeah, I'm saving some of them to read on the plane ride.

–Sandy Hook, New Jersey

Overheard by: caySAYhey

Scene girl to friend: Hey, Ana!
Friend, yelling: Call me by my MySpace name!
Scene girl, sighing: Fine. (pause) Hey, AnaAutomaticAssaultUnicorn!

–Tampa, Florida

Hoochie to friends: Okay, girls, our goal for this weekend is to not end up on the Internet again.

–South Beach, Miami, Florida

Overheard by: Ladle

Teenage gangsta on cell: Naw man, she's not gonna mess with me. I have her MySpace password. Her MySpace password!

–San Diego, California

College student to friend: I watch less porn when I have a girlfriend…I don’t know why.

–Daytona Beach, Florida

Dumb girl talking to small group of friends: Only famous people use Twitter.

–Coney Island, New York

Overheard by: Janelle