Boy, about people stepping on crabs: Looks like I'm not the only one with crab problems.
–Jones Beach, New York
Boy, about people stepping on crabs: Looks like I'm not the only one with crab problems.
–Jones Beach, New York
Drunk boy: Anemic? Isn't that when you eat too much white bread?
–Poolside, Perth, Australia
Older rich man: I stopped using soap back in '74. There's a lot to be said for some hot water and a good scrub.
–Destin, Florida
Girl, to her friend who has just dropped a tortilla: Five second rule!
Friend: I am not eating a fucking tortilla off the floor of Tijuana!
Several bystanders: We’re in Rosarito!
–Taco stand, Rosarito, Baja
Guy: Oh, man, I’ve got salt in my penis now. That shit hurts.
Girl: I don’t really think it matters what goes in my vagina.
–Melbourne Beach, Florida
Overheard by: H K
Girl on phone: Did you go to my car yet? (pause) Shit, I wanted you to grab my deodorant. (pause) You have deodorant? (disgusted pause) I'm not going to use deodorant you just scraped off yourself!
–Coney Island, New York
Woman, talking about a topless sunbather: Is that a man?
Guy: No.
Woman: God, that is so not New Jersey.
–South Beach, Miami
Overheard by: Marty
Little boy wearing rash guard: Mom, that little boy isn't wearing a shirt.
Mom: Mmm-huh.
Little boy: Why doesn't he have to wear a shirt?
Mom: Because his mom doesn't love him, that's why. He'll get skin cancer and die.
–Salisbury Beach, Massachusetts
OC dude #1: So, like, when you were at college, did you have to do your own laundry?
OC dude #2: Yeah.
OC dude #1: That sucks. I had to do my own laundry for, like, a year.
OC dude #2: It’s actually not that bad.
OC dude #1: Yeah, it actually makes you feel really responsible.
–Huntington Beach, California
Overheard by: Lena
Guy: Can you pass the ChapStick? Because “lip gloss” has the taint.
–Cambria, California
Overheard by: nadia
