Body parts

Frat guy trying to get to house behind closed gate: Dude, what the hell?
Teen girl on balcony across street: Boy, to open that gate you gotta' open yo' legs!

–Seaside, Florida

Girl: What is that?!
Guy, flipping it over: Oh my God. Are those eye sockets?
Girl: Ewww. That’s no jellyfish.
Guy: It looks like an alligator head.
Girl: But alligators aren’t in salt water. Maybe it got lost?
Guy: Look it has a…spine?
Girl: But a head wouldn’t have a-
Woman sitting nearby: -It’s a chicken breast. I just threw it out.
Girl and Guy: Oh.

–St. Augustine, Florida

Overheard by: Cristen

Little girl: Do you have a stronger brain or a stronger heart?
Dad: Who?
Little girl: You?
Dad: Both.

–Rye, New York

Overheard by: Lobster

Girl on cell: Sometimes I just wanna beat you. Like, with my hand… Not my fist.

–Tampa, Florida

Overheard by: SB

Boy: So are we ready to go?
(no response)
Boy: Hey!
Girl: Sorry, my eyes were closed.

–Oceanside Beach, California

Bikini #1: Duuude, your birthmark has gotten bigger…
Bikini #2: That’s because my thigh has gotten bigger.

–The Hamptons, New York

Blonde: So my mom fucked me last night.
Friend: She what?
Blonde: You know, held up her middle finger…
Friend: Um…

–Malibu, California

Drunk girl #1: Oh my god! Look at that guy's balls!
Drunk girl #2: Where?!
Drunk girl #1: Around his neck!
Drunk girl #2: Wow! They're huge!

–Rocky Point, Mexico

Girl #1, playing Taboo and giving clues for “big brother”: Ummm. I have two of them!
Girl #2: Hands? Eyes?
Girl #1: No! Um! Um! Big? Large?
Girl #2: Legs!
Girl #1: Oh my god!

–Newcastle, Australia

Man #1: Man, I’ve got some sandy nuts. Sannndy nuuuts!
Man #2: Dude, shake it over there. You’re getting your nut-sand all over me.

–Ocean Beach, San Diego, California

Overheard by: Daryl