Drinking dude: He was a cool guy until he pissed in the closet.
–Long Beach, New York
Drinking dude: He was a cool guy until he pissed in the closet.
–Long Beach, New York
Girl #1: I get so many freckles in the sun.
Girl #2: Yeah, I am so going to get cancer in 2 years. I have so much sun damage.
Girl #3: Um, actually freckles just mean that your skin is working.
–Robert Moses Beach, Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Jackie
Drag queen, dressed as a princess with a mop: Come in and have a drink! Best place around!
Straight girl: What are you cleaning?
Drag queen: Girl, it gets messy around here, can't you see? (proceeds to use mop on girl's glasses)
–Fire Island, New York
Overheard by: Cordelia
Three-year-old playing kitchen, to adults: Does anyone want a taste of my spicy vagina?
–Lake George, New York
Preppy 30-something guy: I mean, all the clubs in Europe are naked clubs now. (pause) Seriously, like, everybody’s naked!
–Indian Wells Beach, New York
Teen girl: My shorts are expanding like a tampon!
–Jones Beach, New York
Guy #1: Wait… When are you getting circumcised, bro?
Guy #2: Tomorrow.
–Robert Moses Beach, New York
Teenage boy #1: I'm gonna grab your nipple.
Teenage boy #2: You better grab my nipple!
–Head of the Fish Regatta, Saratoga Springs, New York
Drunk sunbather: Have I told you I hate kites? I just hate them. They make me want to vomit. Also, I don’t like adjectives, so don’t call this a ‘tasty sandwich.’
–Jones Beach, New York
Overheard by: pole
