Girl looking for spot to lay down with family: Can we not go where there are so many shells?
–Point Lookout, New York
Overheard by: Rachel
Chubby eight-year-old boy, walking and kicking sand up with his feet: Woah! Ma! Look at this! They've even got real sand here!
Exasperated mom, clutching French fries: No shit! It's real sand! Buying fake sand would be dumb. Everyone would steal it.
–The Bahamas
Overheard by: Fake sand maker
Annoyingly loud blonde: You did it in the ocean?!
–Olde Angel Inn Pub, Niagara-on-the-Lake, Canadia
Chubby guy to sister: Sand is rocks that disintegrated over time because of volcanoes.
–The Dunes, Michigan
Girl: They look so much bigger when you’re on your knees!… Um, I meant the waves.
–Loon Point, Summerland, California
Overheard by: likes big waves
Sunbathing girl: Ahhh! Burning sensation!
–Ocean City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Kristin
Seven-year-old girl with net, shouting to friend and running to the water: Come on, Meghan! This is a humongous scientific emergency!
–Wellfleet, Massachusetts
Blonde: Why is the water so much saltier on this coast? They really need to stop putting all their extra salt in the water.
Dude: Extra salt?
Blonde: Yeah, isn’t that what the government does — just dumps the barrels of extra salt into the water?
–Daytona Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Kristin
Girl: Ooh, it's so pretty here…like on Lost!
Guy (stepping around litter): Yeah, complete with used diapers.
–South Padre Island, Texas
Overheard by: The Other
Four-year-old boy, winding up long conversation: And so that's why spiders live in your eyeballs. They play in the blood and love to drink dirty water. (pause) Can I have a snack?
–Santa Barbara, California
