Old cougar: It was good ole fashioned hanky panky. Fun, but definitely not worth all the sand that got up there.


Bikini blonde #1: I'm not dumb, I'm on vacation.
Bikini blonde #2: The ocean makes me wet.

–Varadero, Cuba

Overheard by: beach ginger

Idiot dad: You know they import all this sand from Florida, that's why it's so soft.
Idiot son: Yeah, I've heard that too.

–Newcomb Hollow Beach, Wellfleet, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Alana Geary

10-year-old boy to younger brother: All mother nature gave you is a bag of shit.

–North Padre, Texas

Four-year-old girl (disappointed, looking at a jellyfish): I've never seen one of these before…but I thought it would be longer.

–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina

Overheard by: I Was Surprised Too

Old man: I think it's too late to swim, the oil is washing up on the beach.
Old woman: Yeah, it's too late for a lot of things now.
Old man: We should move back to Detroit. It's less polluted.
Old woman: I don't want to die in Detroit. Remember, we had this conversation already.

–Pier, St Petersburg, Florida

Overheard by: Sandy Paws

Lady to friends: Wow! This is a lot of sand!

–Cocoa Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Courtney

Activist #1: Hey girls, want to save the world together?
Girl #1: Ummmm…
Activist #2: Do you like our planet?
Girl #2: Eh, I've been to better. Thanks, but no thanks.

–Seal Beach, California

Tourist: Hey, the water is coming up really high.
Local: Yeah, it’s definitely a high tide today.
Tourist: How come it does that? I mean, what makes the water come up so high?
Local: Well, let’s just say it has a lot to do with the moon.

–Pismo-Oceano Dunes, California

Overheard by: janie

Eight-year-old girl: Evil! The water is evil!
Older brother: Yippie ki yay!

–Mexico Beach, Florida

Overheard by: LULU