Fat girl, to friend: That tan girl looks better in my bikini than I do.
Random guy walking by: Yeah, she does.
–Traverse City, Michigan
Overheard by: Cari
Archive for the ‘Michigan’ Category
Trick Question… They’re All Equally Gross Once You Hit Thirty-Five
Teen girl #1: Oh my god, you can see his balls!
Teen girl #2: There’s nothing grosser than dad-balls.
Teen girl #1: Grandpa-balls!
–Stoney, Michigan
Overheard by: Waggies
You’ve Never Ordered from Papa Johannesburg’s?
Girl #1: Who really invented pizza?
Girl #2: I think it was the Africans.
Guy: Africans? Come on, they’re still not eating pizza.
–Mt. Clemens, Michigan
Overheard by: Lauren
Tie Goes to the Hungriest
Thin little girl: Let me see it! Let me see it!
Fat little girl: No! MY dead fish!
–Lake Erie, Monroe, Michigan
Overheard by: sandra g
Better, I Suppose, Than ‘Her Boobs Were Kind of Saggy So She Just Tucked Them Into Her Shorts.’
Woman: Her shorts were kinda baggy so she just tucked them under her boobs.
–Warren Dunes, Michigan
Overheard by: Syd O’Banion
Still Think the Media Is to Blame for Obesity and Violence?
Mom: Hey, Jason! I’ll give you fiiive dollars if you can catch a seagull!
Kid: So?
Mom: That’s like… eight Twinkies! [Kid begins chasing gulls.] Oh, look, he’s trying to hit them with rocks!
–South Haven, Michigan
That’s What You Said About the Nina, the Pinta, and the Santa Maria
Little boy: Dad, what’s the navy?
Dad: It’s the army, but with boats.
–South Haven, Michigan
Predator UAV Designers: ‘Eeeexcellent!’
Fat guy: Oh boy, that plane looks just like a seagull. You’d never see it coming! Oh wait, that is a seagull.
–Air show, Lake Michigan
Overheard by: Steve W
He Became a Dwarf Just So He Could Say That
Dwarf to drunk chick at bar: So, have you ever had a dwarf go up on you?
–Manistee, Michigan
Overheard by: Gabby
You Mean While You Were Out Spreading Herpes?
Girl to friend in hot-pants: What have you been doing besides looking fat in those shorts all day?
–Lake Michigan
