Mom: Hey, Jason! I’ll give you fiiive dollars if you can catch a seagull!
Kid: So?
Mom: That’s like… eight Twinkies! [Kid begins chasing gulls.] Oh, look, he’s trying to hit them with rocks!
–South Haven, Michigan
Mom: Hey, Jason! I’ll give you fiiive dollars if you can catch a seagull!
Kid: So?
Mom: That’s like… eight Twinkies! [Kid begins chasing gulls.] Oh, look, he’s trying to hit them with rocks!
–South Haven, Michigan
Fat guy: Oh boy, that plane looks just like a seagull. You’d never see it coming! Oh wait, that is a seagull.
–Air show, Lake Michigan
Overheard by: Steve W
Dwarf to drunk chick at bar: So, have you ever had a dwarf go up on you?
–Manistee, Michigan
Overheard by: Gabby
Girl to friend in hot-pants: What have you been doing besides looking fat in those shorts all day?
–Lake Michigan
Girl wearing bikini to group of girls wearing chunky sneakers, shorts with suspenders and bedazzled tank tops: Why are you guys wearing that?
Girl in group, nonchalantly: Cuz' we lookin' swagalicious.
–St. Joseph, Michigan