Homosexuality

Girl #1: So…plans for tonight?
Girl #2: Yeah, actually. I'm going out with Beto. He just moved to Niterói with his boyfriend.
Girl #1: Wait. What? His *boyfriend*? So he finally came out, eh?
Girl #2: Well…he didn't come out per se. He just said, “So, this is my boyfriend, Bruno.”

–Ipanema Beach, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

Drunk hobo to group of gay guys: That's why I love South Beach. It's gay, gay, gay!

–Lincoln Road, Florida

Overheard by: David

Teen boy: Fucking faggots!
Queer: How can he tell I’m gay?
Lesbo: How can he tell I’m a lesbian? What, do we exude a flamboyantly-homosexual aura or something? Fuck, we’re cuddling with a member of the opposite gender, and people still know we’re gay! Damn, it’s like P.E. class all over again.

–Delta, British Columbia, Canadia

Jock #1: Did you see him at the party last night? I mean, what the hell?
Jock #2: Dude, he’s such a fag.
Jock #1: I heard he swallows.
Jock #2: What’s his name again?
Jock #1: Eric.

–Ocean City, Maryland

Random guy in middle of large group of male friends: Ah, man! And my nipples just got like so hard right now.
Friend: Dude, man! They totally did! (chorus of laughter as they walk away)

–Fort Walton Beach, Florida

Trendy Asian chick: I've seen a lot of transvestites in my day, but only one with a beard.
Old, well-dressed Mexican man: He must have forgotten to shave.

–Newport Beach, California

Girl: Check out that guy’s package.
Guy: What?
Girl: Look at the guy in the Speedo.
Guy: No.
Girl: Just look. He’s huge.
Guy: Damn. You’re right. I’m embarrassed now. And I feel a little gay. I’m going to the bathroom.

–Tobay Beach, Long Island, New York

Overheard by: Rob

Woman, watching animal abuse commercial on Logo: I hate this commercial. This is why I don't watch this channel. Well, this and all the gays.

–West Palm Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Enjoys the gays

Girl: Are you going to go back to 24 Hour Fitness?
Guy: Gayness in my anus…

–Pacific Beach, California

Teen male #1: I just saw two lesbians kissing in the water.
Teen male #2: What? Why didn't you take a fucking picture?
Teen male #1: Right, I forgot to take my camera phone with me while diving into the water…

–North Crete, Greece