Guy standing at window: I love tit‐ass!
Guy on boardwalk: Fuck yeah!

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Overheard by: Roomate

Mother to young child: Do you hear the ship, honey?
Child: No, mommy, I don’t.
Mother: Do you feel the ship moving?
Child: Yes! I feel my shit moving.

–Carnival Freedom Cruise, Caribbean Sea

Overheard by: InTheNextStall

Angry woman: You touchin’ my weave!

–Coney Island, New York

Girl playing volleyball, as guy switches to her teach to even up sides: I promise we won’t suck too much…

–Adelaide, Australia

Lady in vehicle on cell: I mean, she wants to know everything, and it’s really getting annoying, I’m like “mom, Jesus Christ, hey, I took a shit today, you want to know if it floated or if it sank?”

–Tampa, Florida

Overheard by: Elise

Girl to friend: He was upset because she wouldn’t let him cum on her face!

–Wrightsville Beach, North Carolina

Boston woman in her late 50s: … And it’s not like it used to be. Jamaica Plain has become so culturally diverse… It’s so unfortunate!
Sunburned woman in her late 50s: Um. Where is that sunscreen?

–Surfside Beach, Nantucket, Massachusetts

Overheard by: KP

Mother to five‐year‐old: I don’t want to hear your shit!

–Seaside Heights, New Jersey

Overheard by: Luminesce

Boy: Man, I can’t believe she’s studying, on a Sunday! What a loser.
Girl’s voice, yelling from inside house: I can still hear you…

–Gold Coast, Australia

Cheesy 15‐year‐old boy: I can’t believe you were about to go up to him and say that. Ha, ha, ha.
Cheesy 15‐year‐old girl: Wouldn’t be the first time I made someone cry.
Cheesy 15‐year‐old boy: You’re a whore.

–Ocean City, New Jersey