Little girl: Daddy! Guess what I am supposed to be!
Dad: You are a crab.
Little girl: Right! Okay, Daddy, now it’s your turn.

Dad sits there, talking to his wife.

Little girl: Daddy! You are supposed to be something!
Dad: I am. I am being a cool guy.

–Horseshoe Bay Ferry Terminal, Vancouver, Canadia

Queer: It turns out sleeping with a deaf guy is awesome!

–Penn’s Landing, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Chris Newcomer

American tourist, to black islander carving a sculpture from a log: You people are so talented!

–Straw Market, Nassau, Bahamas

Overheard by: Dumbfounded Tourist

Cute girl walking down the boardwalk: I’ve been stared at seven times already!
Random guy walking past: Eight.

–Seaside Heights, New Jersey

Overheard by: bonzo

Out-of-shape 50-something customer: I don't know, the guys I see riding fixed-gear bikes are in really good shape.
20-something bike salesman: That shouldn't intimidate you; it should inspire you.

–Sag Harbor, New York

Overheard by: the lerpa

Woman to another, trying to get support to protect the seals: Yeah, my daughter's friend wants to be a marine biologist. She is so smart.
Daughter's friend, in confused voice: Hey, I got gum on my camera.

–Children's Beach, La Jolla, California

Dude: This beach trip has been so awesome!
Chick: We’ve been here all week, and you haven’t walked down to the beach once.
Dude: Yeah, but it’s great to just sit around, drink, and get high.
Chick: You do that at home.
Dude: But I can see the water from the window. At home all I see is the parking lot.

–Nags Head, North Carolina

Waiter to customer: Sir, you just missed her. She looks hotter. She just got a transplant.

–South Padre Island, Texas

Elderly lady: Come now, y’all! Key West is gonna be loads of fun! They gots the Ripley’s and Cuban people!

–Lido deck, The Carnival Glory, Key West

Overheard by: y’all need an icepack on dat thang?

Boy: Man, I can't believe she's studying, on a Sunday! What a loser.
Girl's voice, yelling from inside house: I can still hear you…

–Gold Coast, Australia