Teens

Teen girl #1: Have you been going to church lately?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, I found a new church I really like.
Teen girl #1: Really?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, it like smells all creepy, and, like, they speak in tongues. It is really scary, so I will probably go to this one!
Teen girl #1: Cool. Maybe I’ll go with you.

–Shilshole Beach, Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Why do those people have goatskins on?

Teen girl #1 is making a crease in her towel and filling it with sand.

Teen girl #2: What the fuck are you doing?
Teen girl #1: Look! It’s ‘de Nile’!
Teen girl #2: What? You mean the Nile River? How could that be the Nile River? There’s no water involved!
Teen girl #1, after long pause: Well… Has anyone ever told you that you look like Danny DeVito?

–Jericho Beach, British Columbia, Canadia

Overheard by: bondgirl

Teenage girl #1: Wait, if there's a Mrs. Claus and Santa, then how come he doesn't have any kids?
Teenage girl #2: Well, all the children in the world are his kids.
Teenage girl #1: Santa's kind of a pedophile if you think about it. Like, I'll sneak into your house and give you presents if you love me.
Teenage girl #2: Yeah, ew.

–Misquamicit Beach, Rhode Island

Overheard by: Amanda

Teen girl: I heard there are sharks in the lake.
Teen boy: That’s probably not true.
Teen girl: It’s true. Like, somebody got killed here by a shark.
Teen boy: I think you have upstate New York confused with anywhere with a shoreline.
Teen girl: But…
Teen boy: ‘But’-nothing if you wanna get fucked later.

–Lake George, New York

Teen boy #1: I think those girls look 14.
Teen boy #2: No, dude, they gotta be 16.
Teen boy #1: I am telling them I am 20.
Teen boy #2: I am 17.
Teen boy #1: No, dude, you got to use your fake age.
Teen boy #2: Man, that’s why you got game.

–Foster Avenue Beach, Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Jinx

Teen girl: Do sea lions swim?
Mom: No, they ride boats.

–Santa Cruz, California

Overheard by: just wanted to take a look at SEA LIONS

Teen girl: What'cha doing, dad?
Father: Staring at the cow.
Teen girl (looking ahead): Where?
Father: In the water.
Teen girl (frantically looking at the sea): Where?!
Father: In my imagination.

–Miami Beach, Florida

Overheard by: amused book-reader

Hot teen girl #1: Sexy llama come to mama. (throws imaginary lasso)
Hot teen girl #2 (caught in the imaginary lasso): Unce unce unce unce…yes.
Random lady to son nearby: See honey, this is why we don't eat magical mushrooms.

–Rehoboth Beach, Deleware

Overheard by: kevin

Teenage girl #1: Yeah, my dad’s getting re-married this summer.
Teenage girl #2: Omigod, my dad just got one of those Filipino mail order brides, and let me tell you, they make the best egg rolls ever.

–Nassau, Bahamas

Overheard by: Spring Break wooooo!

Teenage boy #1: Yeah, Verizon is supposed to get a 4G network sometime soon.
Teenage boy #2: Do you even know what 4G means?
Teenage boy #1: 4 dimensions! Duh!

–Granite Bay, California

Overheard by: AB