Eight-year-old boy to valet fetching a car outside a fancy restaurant: You run like an idiot!
Mom: Quiet, dear, he is just a car parking guy.
–Palm Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Ashley
Eight-year-old boy to valet fetching a car outside a fancy restaurant: You run like an idiot!
Mom: Quiet, dear, he is just a car parking guy.
–Palm Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Ashley
Angry father, trying to climb into boat with son: Turn off the fucking engine, man! I've got a fucking five-year-old here! Jesus, use your fucking head!
–The Hamptons, New York
Young kid: Awww look, you were right. Now I don’t get to punch you.
–Vero Beach, Florida
Upset teenage daughter to mother: Mom, I can't have sugar! (pause) What is “creme brulee,” anyways?
–Huntington Beach, California
Mom (exasperatedly): Come on children, you guys going to give me heart failure!
Six-year-old: You going to give yourself heart failure, cause you wouldn't leave us alone.
–Bridgetown, Barbados
Little kid to mom, as storm is coming: If thunder claps while you're in the water, you're gonna die!
–Pawley's Island, South Carolina
Overheard by: Running for Cover
Mother, holding one son in the ocean and calling another on shore: See? The water's fantastic. You have nothing to worry about.
Four-year-old son, crying: I don't want to die here!
–Palm Beach, Aruba
Man: Come back in the water with me.
Boy: No. You tried to drown me! You almost killed me!
Man: Well. You shouldn't have kicked me.
Boy: Kickin' someone in the ding-dong ain't gonna kill them.
Man: It might.
–Destin, Florida
Little boy: Mommy, do you know this?
Mom: What, honey?
Little boy: Do you know this?
Mom: What, honey? I know everything.
Little boy: You're crazy.
Mom: Yeah, I knew this.
–Provincetown, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Just waiting for a lobster roll
Cute toddler to friends: Whoever has a dog, raise your hand… so I can murder it!
–Belmar, New Jersey
Overheard by: Willy
