Mother: We're all set for the picnic!
Random gay dude: Oh, really? Yum! What'd you get us?
Mother: Uh, roast pork sandwiches.
Random gay dude: Ooooh, sounds good! (wanders off)
Mother (whispers): You have to be careful what you say around here.
–East Hampton, New York
Overheard by: pop pop
Little boy: Mommy, do you know this?
Mom: What, honey?
Little boy: Do you know this?
Mom: What, honey? I know everything.
Little boy: You're crazy.
Mom: Yeah, I knew this.
–Provincetown, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Just waiting for a lobster roll
Hyper seven-year-old: Sit!
Frazzled mother: Who are you talking to?
Hyper seven-year-old, matter-of-factly: Myself.
–Taco Bell, Deerfield Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Kiwi
Little kid: Mommy, what are those squishy things that hang by big, round balls?
Mom: Are you talking about jellyfish and tentacles?
Little kid: Yeah, that’s it: testicles.
–Huntington Beach, Surf City, California
Mother to child, as they leave the beach: You're like walkin', talkin' birth control.
–Brownie Lake, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: Erin Christey
Little girl: Mommy, where’s the rest of your bathing suit?
Mother: It’s called a ‘thong,’ honey.
Little girl: Like that song?
Mother: Yes, honey, just like the song.
Little girl hums ‘Thong Song.’
–West Palm Beach, Florida
Little girl: Mommy, where’s the rest of your bathing suit?
Mother: It’s called a ‘thong,’ honey.
Little girl: Like that song?
Mother: Yes, honey, just like the song.
Little girl hums ‘Thong Song.’
–West Palm Beach, Florida
Mom to son as he runs off to play: Don’t touch the sand! Don’t touch the sand!
–Long Beach, New York
Overheard by: Jawdropped
