Guy: Can you pass the ChapStick? Because “lip gloss” has the taint.
–Cambria, California
Overheard by: nadia
Guy: Can you pass the ChapStick? Because “lip gloss” has the taint.
–Cambria, California
Overheard by: nadia
Guy: So I went to the party last night… and she gave me a BJ. Told you I was beast.
Friend: Well, she has herpes, so you should get tested.
Guy: That whore!
–Holden Beach, North Carolina
Obnoxiously drunk ho as she leans on bro for support: Don't even think about thinking!
–Pacific Beach, San Diego, California
Dude: That’s why they call me ‘the Titanic.’
Chick: They don’t call you ‘the Titanic.’
–Santa Monica, California
Overheard by: Ana
Nature’s mishap: I can’t take off this towel.
Logical friend: Why? You do have something on under that.
Nature’s mishap: Well, no.
Logical friend: What?! What happened to your trunks? You didn’t lose them in the water, did you?
Nature’s mishap: No…they’re just gone.
Logical friend, to another guy: I can’t keep my eye off of John for one minute, can I, without him doing something stupid?
–Long Beach, New York
A punk passes an 80-year-old woman in a t-shirt emblazoned with the word ‘Hottie.’
Punk: I’d hit it.
–Boardwalk, Ocean City, Maryland
Man riding away on bike: Oh ya, why don’t you come over here and do something about it? Eat shit and fuck your mom!
–Playa Del Rey, CA
Hot girl to extremely fat guy transfixed by her boobs: What, are you comparing size? Shape? Cause mine might not be as big as yours, but they're far perkier.
–Uvongo Beach, South Africa
Overheard by: dizziebean
Old man #1: This one girl, she let me play with myself.
Old man #2: Oh, yeah?
Old man #1: Yeah… And some of them even let you touch their tits.
Old man #2: Do you still go to Long Island for that?
–Compo Beach, Westport, Connecticut
Overheard by: Forgot my iPod
Hot 20-year-old guy #1: I'm still dripping.
Hot 20-year-old guy #2: Dude, you banged that chick like a month ago and you're still dripping?
Hot 20-year-old guy #1: Dude, duh! She was Latina!
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
