Words

Girl to boy showing a picture: This is for Valentine's Day.
Boy: Umm… That's really disturbing, is it a bouquet of penises?
Girl: It's not disturbing! It's for Valentine's. (pause) Wait, did you just say “penises”?

–Tampa, Florida

Guy to girl: I'm going set up booby traps round your house!
Girl to guy: Oooh, booby traps, I like the sound of that…

–Tampa, Florida

Man: One small monkey bread, please.
Girl: What’s a monkey bread?
Man: I have no idea.

–Monkey Bread Café, Ocean City, New Jersey

Overheard by: Kristin

Girl: I'm such a Jew when it comes to…
Boy, exasperated: Why can't you just say “frugal”?!

–Atlantic City, New Jersey

Drunk college student, spilling wine on herself: Oh great. Now I’m wet all over!
Drunk college boy nearby: What! Who said that!?

–Gold Coast, Australia

Teenage boy #1: Yeah, Verizon is supposed to get a 4G network sometime soon.
Teenage boy #2: Do you even know what 4G means?
Teenage boy #1: 4 dimensions! Duh!

–Granite Bay, California

Overheard by: AB

Guy to another: Dude! I had to google “milf”, I didn't know what it meant!

–Long Beach Island, New Jersey

Mother to young child: Do you hear the ship, honey?
Child: No, mommy, I don't.
Mother: Do you feel the ship moving?
Child: Yes! I feel my shit moving.

–Carnival Freedom Cruise, Caribbean Sea

Overheard by: InTheNextStall

Girl, wearing lifeguard swimsuit and applying sunblock: Do my hole… NO! My back hole!

–Sacandaga Lake, New York

Overheard by: sherpa

Kid: Mom, where are we going?
Mom: Just walk straight!
Kid: Where’s straight?!

–Robert Moses Beach, New York

Overheard by: Gwast