Ooo, Ashes Of Dead Mouseketeers. Luxurious!

Idiot dad: You know they import all this sand from Florida, that's why it's so soft.
Idiot son: Yeah, I've heard that too.

–Newcomb Hollow Beach, Wellfleet, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Alana Geary

Posted on February 2, 2023
Geography, Idiots, Massachusetts, Nature, Stupidity

Hell Is Other People Like You

Dude: Yo, that guy’s Asian as hell!

–Nag’s Head, North Carolina

Overheard by: alxie

Posted on January 31, 2023
Asian people, North America, North Carolina, Race, Stupidity, United States

Einstein: Now This Is Relativity!

American beach-goer #1: I wonder if the people here have trouble understanding us sometimes.
American beach-goer #2: Why would they?
American beach-goer #1: Because of our accents.
American beach-goer #2: But we don’t have accents.

–Edinburgh, Scotland

Posted on January 25, 2023
Friends, Idiots, Language Barrier, Stupidity, UK

She'll Have a Flashback to This Moment, Years Later in the Back of a Car

Four-year-old girl (disappointed, looking at a jellyfish): I've never seen one of these before…but I thought it would be longer.

–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina

Overheard by: I Was Surprised Too

Posted on January 10, 2023
Animals, Kids, Nature, Size, South Carolina, Stupidity

Anybody Still Worried about the Focus on Dead White Europeans in Schools?

Girl #1: We can go see the Kula botanical gardens.
Girl #2: Where on the island is it?
Girl #1, reading guidebook section: It’s in flora and fauna — I don’t know where that is.
Girl #2: Um… Flora and fauna means plants and animals, it isn’t a place on the map.
Girl #1: Well, I don’t speak Hawaiian so how was I supposed to know?

–Kihei, Maui, Hawaii

Overheard by: ispeakhawaiian

Posted on January 8, 2023
Bimbettes, Hawaii, Stupidity

If They're Below 100 Decibels, the Terrorists Win

JAP lady: Do those planes have to be so loud?

–Air Show with the Blue Angels, Jones Beach, New York

Overheard by: Joanna

Posted on January 8, 2023
JAPS, New York, Questions, Stupidity

You Don't Need Sunblock in There — It's Dark

Girl, wearing lifeguard swimsuit and applying sunblock: Do my hole… NO! My back hole!

–Sacandaga Lake, New York

Overheard by: sherpa

Posted on January 7, 2023
Default, Girls, New York, Offers and requests, Stupidity, Sunbathing, Words

Will I Be Able To Remember You Afterwards?

Guy: Hey, beautiful ladies! My name is Sean. I run a company that increases the number of hits your website gets on search engines. I’m sure I could help you in your line of work What do you do?
Woman: I’m a neurosurgeon.
Guy: Hey, it’s good to see that even a brain surgeon has time to head out to the beach. Let me show you how my company can help you get more business.
Woman: I’m sure it can’t.
Guy: Well then, how ’bout I just give you my number?
Woman: How about I just give you a lobotomy?

–Nahant Beach, Massachusetts