North Carolina

Dude #1: That cloud over the moon looks like the number three! Dude, that is crazy!
Dude #2: Why is that crazy?
Dude #1: Because that was Dale Earnhardt’s number. It’s like he’s speaking to me!

–Nags Head, North Carolina

Overheard by: Gambitgirl

Little girl to her mother: I spy something pretty!
Teenage girl, looking the mirror: It’s me.

–Public restroom, Atlantic Beach, North Carolina

Lady: You have an awfully long deck.
Homeowner: Thanks… Oh, you said ‘deck.’

–Topsail Island, North Carolina

Overheard by: Jim

Formerly smiling lifeguard: Great, I’ve got bird shit on me, and we have to listen to John Mayer!

–Wrightsville Beach, North Carolina

Bald man to baby on blanket (in baby voice): Do you have somethin' to say? Are you thinkin'? Are you thinkin'? Yes you are.
Woman next to him: He's pooping.
Bald man: Are you poopin'? Are you poopin'? Yes you are!

–Sunset Beach, North Carolina

Overheard by: Emma

Girl: It’s so nice out today. I love natural wind.

–Hilton Head Island, South Carolina

Overheard by: Lindsay

Tourist: What a beautiful day! If it were a girl I’d take her home and eat her pussy out all night!

–Nags Head, North Carolina

Child: Mommy, how old are you?
Mother: I am forty.
Child: [counting on fingers] Jeez, Mommy, you’re running out of numbers.

–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina

Girl waiting for busy elevator: I hate this elevator! It always takes so long. They should just make one go up and the other go down.

–Atlantic Beach, North Carolina

Overheard by: Smithra

Beach patrol: Ma’am, I am going to have to ask you to put on your top. This is not a “clothing optional” beach.
Man sitting with topless woman: Leave her alone. She is trying to get a full body tan.
Beach patrol: Sir, I think you are asking quite a bit from the sun.

–Fort Macon, North Carolina

Overheard by: El Gee