Girl looking for spot to lay down with family: Can we not go where there are so many shells?
–Point Lookout, New York
Overheard by: Rachel
Queer: Josh! If you don’t put your ass away right now, I’m gonna fuck it!
–Fire Island Pines, Brookhaven, New York
Overheard by: Your Buddy in Blue
Four-year-old to 12-year-old: You come over here every single day. No one likes you. Go back to your own camp.
–Lake Champlain, New York
Frat boy to buds: Dude, strippers look a lot different once you get them home.
–Grafton Lakes State Park, New York
Little boy: Daddy, look what I found in the sand!
Father: Don’t touch it. I don’t know what it is, but don’t touch it.
–Jungle Gym, Coney Island Beach, New York
Dumb girl talking to small group of friends: Only famous people use Twitter.
–Coney Island, New York
Overheard by: Janelle
Drinking dude: He was a cool guy until he pissed in the closet.
–Long Beach, New York
Girl #1: I get so many freckles in the sun.
Girl #2: Yeah, I am so going to get cancer in 2 years. I have so much sun damage.
Girl #3: Um, actually freckles just mean that your skin is working.
–Robert Moses Beach, Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Jackie
