Girl: I had this weird dream about anal sex last night. I think it was from when you were joking around when I was bent over the sink before.
Boy: I wasn’t joking around.
–Bradley Beach, New Jersey
Girl: I had this weird dream about anal sex last night. I think it was from when you were joking around when I was bent over the sink before.
Boy: I wasn’t joking around.
–Bradley Beach, New Jersey
Queer #1, holding apple core: Is this biodegradable?
Queer #2, driving: Yes!
Queer #1: Okay! (tosses it out the window)
–Sandy Hook, New Jersey
Cute toddler to friends: Whoever has a dog, raise your hand… so I can murder it!
–Belmar, New Jersey
Overheard by: Willy
Italian girl: So, um… How do you know if you have crabs?
Frat boy: What?
Italian girl: Well, I’m not sure if I just have another yeast infection or dry skin or something…
Frat boy: Why are you asking me this?
Italian girl: Because we slept together last week and now I itch!
–Point Pleasant, New Jersey
Overheard by: jerseygirl
Chick: So, you live in the city? Wow, where do you live, downtown?
Thug kid: Yeah, downtown… Well, not exactly downtown. Harlem.
–Point Pleasant Beach, New Jersey
Overheard by: alison
Stoned surfer: I decided that I won't eat fish anymore, because if I don't eat them, they won't eat me.
–Long Beach Island, New Jersey
Chick #1 disappears into bedroom with dude.
Chick #2: Go ahead, bitch, suck his dick. It’s sandy and it tastes like me.
–Beach Haven, New Jersey
Wet teen boy #1, rubbing eyes: My eyes hurt.
Wet teen boy #2: From the salt?
Wet teen boy #1: Nah. I’ve been outside for two days. They’re used to video game light only.
–Bradley Beach, New Jersey
Overheard by: long time mom
Cop, pointing to trash can filled rim with beer and alcohol bottles: Are all of these yours?
Tall man, pointing to one lone bottle: Well, that one's not mine.
–Belmar, New Jersey
Blonde: So can you, like, get AIDS from kissing?
Guido friend: I don’t know. I think you have to share your DNA to get it.
Blonde: So, do most guys have DNA?
–Seaside Heights, New Jersey
Overheard by:
