Betty Ford dropout: I hate it when you close your eyes and you feel the alcohol, but when you open them you don't.
–Ocean City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Danny
Betty Ford dropout: I hate it when you close your eyes and you feel the alcohol, but when you open them you don't.
–Ocean City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Danny
(group of awkward band geeks on the beach)
Girl #1: Did Dave* and Tina* go back to the house again?
Girl #2: Yes, the whole prom weekend all they have been doing is sneaking off to be alone.
Girl #1: You know they’ve been having sex all the time, don’t you?
(boy next to girl #2 sits up)
Girl #2: If you do it too much it’s not fun anymore.
–Trenton Avenue, Sea Girt, New Jersey
Overheard by: Girt Girl
Mother: Honey, do you want some cheddar cheese Pringles?
Kid: Sure.
Mother: See, they have zero grams trans fat. That’s really important now.
–Bradley Beach, Jersey Shore, New Jersey
Townie broad #1: You can tell how a man treats a woman by how he treats his bike.
Townie broad #2: Bill keeps his in the garage and hasn't ridden it in five years.
–Point Pleasant, New Jersey
White teen girl #1: The first rule of being white is never admitting that you’re white.
White teen girl #2: Oh! I never admit that!
–Avon Beach, New Jersey
Overheard by: NotFromJersey
Sunbathing girl: Ahhh! Burning sensation!
–Ocean City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Kristin
20-ish blonde: What time is it in Florida?
–Ocean City, New Jersey
Girl #1: Do you think a guy would tell you if he had a girlfriend?
Girl #2: Yes, of course he would!
–Belmar, New Jersey
Overheard by: kate
Girl #1: But then I thought, ‘Why the hell would he kiss her when he has me?’
Girl #2: Uh, because of the herpes?
Girl #1: Fuck you.
–Cape May, New Jersey
Overheard by: J.Tro
Five-year-old girl looking at dead jellyfish: I wonder what flavor jelly it likes…
–Atlantic City, New Jersey
Overheard by: jared
