Naked guy #1: My girlfriend thinks it's weird that you and I come here every weekend.
Naked guy #2: Why? Did you tell her Mike and Rob come too?
Naked guy #1: Nah dude, I don't want her to think we're gay.

–Sandy Hook, New Jersey

Girl #1: Whenever I go to Europe I just say I'm Canadian and they don't get weird like they do if you say you're American.
Girl #2: No way I'm claiming to be Canadian! Have you talked to those people?

–Austin, Texas

Weasel on cell: I’m in Brooklyn now, so it will have to wait until later…

–Miami Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Local

Kid: Mom, how come the birds are wrestling each other?
Mom: They hate each other, that’s why.

–Children’s Beach, Nantucket, Massachusetts

Overheard by: I know why the caged bird sings

Sunbathing guy: You know what sucks? Thinking you're more tan than you actually are.

–Ocean City, Maryland

Fat girl: What did you and Michelle talk about on the phone last night?
Skinny girl: She and Alex are fighting.
Fat girl: You're lying, they are not! What did she really tell you?
Skinny girl: Well, she thinks Victoria's replacing her.
Fat girl: Ugh, she could've just talked to me about it… Victoria did kinda replace her, though.

–Lavalette, New Jersey

Overheard by: Crab

Tourist: How do I get to the beach?
Local #1: Get on the 8 and go east.
Tourist: Thanks.
(tourist leaves)
Local #2: You're sending her east.
Local #1: Fuck her, she didn't say which beach.

–Pacific Beach, California

Girl #1: Do you think before you speak?
Girl #2: Well, sometimes I just run my mouth off and hope what I’m saying is true. But then I figure, if it’s not, who’s going to call me on it?
Girl #1: So…tell me about what happened last night again?
Girl #2: Wait, what did I tell you? I don’t remember if I lied.

–Dewey Beach, Delaware

Overheard by: Chel Sea

Girl on cell: Mom, I can't talk right now, I'm in the library. (pause) Yes. (pause) No, I can't talk, I'm studying.

–Blemar Beach, New Jersey

Girl #1: I'm a literalist. If you say something to me, I'm going to take it literally. I'm also not a kidder. I do not kid.

–Coney Island, New York