Drunk girl, holding a can of Milwaukee’s Best, sadly: …I feel bad for Milwaukee.
–Santa Barbara, California
Drunk girl, holding a can of Milwaukee’s Best, sadly: …I feel bad for Milwaukee.
–Santa Barbara, California
Serbian waiter: Card?
Tourist ordering drinks: You're going to card me!? C'mon, I left my card in the State room.
Serbian waiter: Card you? In Prague I work in bar next to high school, no I'm not going to carding! I need your payment card.
–Carnival Cruise, Ensenada, Mexico
Drunk guy: She’s done more blow than it snowed last year!
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Overheard by: Audrey
Cop: All right, what’s in the cup?
Young guy: Uh, beer.
Cop: I asked you what’s in the cup. Now give it to me.
Young guy: I just told you, it’s beer!
Cop: You do know it’s illegal to be drinking on the boardwalk, right?
Young guy: It’s soda.
Cop: It’s beer. Give it to me.
Young guy: No! It’s mine!
Young guy runs off with cup.
–Seaside Heights, New Jersey
Overheard by: also kinda drunk
Dad to buddy’s tween daughter: Susie*, can you get me another beer from the cooler?
Susie: Wow, Jerry, you’re an alcoholic.
Dad’s own tween daughter: My dad is not an alcoholic, he just drinks fast!
–Long Island, New York
Police officer: You’re under arrest for underage drinking in public.
American teen: But they’re from Canada, officer!
Police officer: Got any marijuana in your purse?
–Sandestin, Florida
Overheard by: proudcanadian
