Couples

Enraptured girl, watching sunset with boyfriend: I just love it when the sun sinks into the sea like this! But I have a question…
Boy: Huh? What?
Girl, turning serious: Why doesn't the sea boil?

–Kauai, Hawaii

(on board a ferry full of black people)
Elderly southern woman: Seems to me there are a lot of blacks here.
Half deaf elderly husband: What?
Elderly southern woman: Blacks!

–Ferry, Bermuda

Drunk girl to drunker boyfriend: It's better to throw up than give up!
Hobo: Respect the pussy!

–Atlantic City, New Jersey

Overheard by: AlwaysGoodAdvice

Tourist wife: Look at their butts. These bikinis are too small…Honey? Did you hear me?
Tourist husband: Huh?
Tourist wife: My point exactly.

–Ipanema Beach, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

Guy trying to park his car: Honey, am I straight? Am I straight?
Wife: I damned well hope so.

–Grand Beach, Manitoba, Canadia

Overheard by: Shalamar

Wife: Frank, you heard about the 11 second rule?
Husband, staring at hot nude chick nearby: What?
Wife: The 11 second rule. If the cops catch you staring at breasts for more than 11 seconds, you have to go to jail.
Husband: No way.
Wife: And keep in mind, there are lots of gay men on this beach.

–Race Point Nude Beach, Cape Cod, Massachusetts

Wife: Frank, you heard about the 11 second rule?
Husband, staring at hot nude chick nearby: What?
Wife: The 11 second rule. If the cops catch you staring at breasts for more than 11 seconds, you have to go to jail.
Husband: No way.
Wife: And keep in mind, there are lots of gay men on this beach.

–Race Point Nude Beach, Cape Cod, Massachusetts

Suburban tourist #1: Remember that time when I threw the cat out in the snow and that guy was staring at me?
Suburban tourist #2: And then John got christened by the cat.
Suburban tourist #1: Yeah, I don't think that cat had peed in six months. It was like a fire hose.
Wife: That John and his temper…

–All Day Breakfast, Kennebunkport, Maine

Overheard by: Amused Locals

Chick: Nothing is getting in my ass!
Dude: Not even a pinky?
Chick: Not even a pinky!

–Huntington Beach, California

(built dude in super-tight white spandex shorts roller blades past a group of hipsters on bicycles)
Biking ironic hipster to girlfriend: Woah. Did you just see that sweet penis?

–North Avenue Beach, Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Kara Lang