Stupidity

American tourist, to black islander carving a sculpture from a log: You people are so talented!

–Straw Market, Nassau, Bahamas

Overheard by: Dumbfounded Tourist

Tourist standing on beach: Excuse me. Can you tell me where the beach is?

–Jones Beach, New York

Overheard by: Shannon

Teen girl #1: God, I hate when people bring their cell phones to the beach.
Teen girl #2: I have my cell phone at the beach right now.
Teen girl #1: Me too.

–Ocean Beach, New Jersey

Brother: I was talking to that couple from Montana, and they said they eat cattails.
Sister: I thought they were vegetarians.

–Puno, Peru

Overheard by: 451

White guy to Asian girl made up like Thai hooker: Hey, are you waiting for me?

–Santa Monica Pier, California

Overheard by: Ann

Male: Your kid is eating the sunscreen.
Female: It's okay, he's bright on the inside. It's good for him.

–Pacific Beach, California

Older guy: We had dinner there earlier in the week. I got food poisoning.
Young kayaking guide: Really? Was it good?

–York Beach, Maine

Tourist: Where do they put the sand in the winter?
Local, sarcastically: Oh, they put it in bags and store it in the convention center.

–Ocean City, Maryland

Overheard by: OC local

Two girls are dancing in their car, while listening to ‘Boom Boom Boom Boom.’

Driver’s seat: Dude, I wonder if people are staring at us right now.
Passenger’s seat: We’re in a car. No one can see us! We have tinted windows!
Driver’s seat: Dude. All the windows are down.

–Spring Lake, New Jersey

Overheard by: Thank god I have a high IQ

Mother: Stop flicking your ear.
Tween son: I can't. My ear is so awesome.
Mother: You're so retarded sometimes.
Tween son: Like dad?

–Orchard Beach, The Bronx, New York

Overheard by: Pinks