Woman #1: You really should have seen this guy's boobs, they were huge.
Woman #2: So he needed a bra?
Man #1: A bro.
Man #2 (with hands on hips, triumphantly): A manzier!
Woman #1: What he needed was some testosterone!
–Hawaii
Overheard by: Festivus for the Rest of Us
Guy #1: Wait… When are you getting circumcised, bro?
Guy #2: Tomorrow.
–Robert Moses Beach, New York
Old guy on oxygen: So, how many more beers can I have??
–Sandbridge, Virginia Beach, Virginia
Overheard by: Mike
Duke guy: Have you read Rebecca?
Duke girl: Of Sunnybrook Farm?
–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Teenage boy: Well, last time I was here I got arrested…
–Hampton Beach, New Hampshire
Overheard by: arc
Tourist: Hey! You guys musta cleaned up real good after all the hurricanes last year. Everything looks brand new again.
Beach attendant: Excuse me?
Tourist: Yeah, you guys did a better job than all those FEMA guys in New Orleans.
Beach attendant: We didn’t get any hurricanes on the West Coast.
Tourist: You must have better levees here then.
Beach attendant: Yeah, we have Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, and the rest of California.
–Laguna Beach, California
Trucker: Well, it’s a Mercury Sable, but that really doesn’t matter. It’s essential that you call me El Conquistador.
–Outer Banks, North Carolina
Overheard by: Just trying to keep in touch with the rest
Drunk guy: I’m scared of you… You look dangerous, like you could beat somebody up.
Drunk girl: What? Why?
Drunk guy: It’s the headband, you look like you know karate.
Drunk girl: I don’t know karate, I know yoga.
–Beaufort, South Carolina
Overheard by: Wish I had that logic….
Guy: Why did you tell *Veronica that I had a small dick?
Girl: Because you do.
Guy: You could have at least told her I know how to use it.
Girl: You don’t!
–Discovery Bay, California
20-something guy, imitating his girlfriend: Rub my back! Put your dick in me! Me, me, me!
–Santa Monica Beach, California
Overheard by: Diana
