Girl: Can you tell me why you’re pissing on the sand?
Guy: We’re in Jersey.
Girl: Yeah, so?
Guy: Jersey’s dirty. It’s your duty as an American to fuckin’ keep it that way, bitch.
–Merivale Avenue, Beach Haven, New Jersey
Overheard by: Snow White
Girl: Can you tell me why you’re pissing on the sand?
Guy: We’re in Jersey.
Girl: Yeah, so?
Guy: Jersey’s dirty. It’s your duty as an American to fuckin’ keep it that way, bitch.
–Merivale Avenue, Beach Haven, New Jersey
Overheard by: Snow White
Girl #1: I love Italian men. And black men.
Girl #2: Didn’t you date a half black, half Italian man?
Girl #1: Yeah.
Girl #2: So where’s the ring?
Girl #1: He went back to jail.
–Ocean City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Genevieve
Bikini blonde #1: I'm not dumb, I'm on vacation.
Bikini blonde #2: The ocean makes me wet.
–Varadero, Cuba
Overheard by: beach ginger
Girl to friend: I'm going to name one of my friends Jew and the other one Hitler, so it would be like Family Feud.
–Tampa, Florida
Queer: That guy sooo just checked you out.
Hot chick: Should I go over there and ask to sit on his face?
Queer: Bianca.
Hot chick: What? I’m horny!
Queer: Me, too, now that I think of it.
–Bondi Beach, Sydney, Australia
Young teen girl: Hey, Mom, Dad told me to ask you, and I’m quoting him, to ‘Please leave a couple of drinks for him before your fat ass hogs them all.’
Mom: Tell your father that he had better be nicer to me or else I’m going to leave his ass for a sexy Latin man named Esteban… again. And you can quote me on that!
–Del Mar, California
Overheard by: Jess the Pirate
Tan chick: But if we go to the spa, I don’t want them to facial my tan away!
–Martha’s Vineyard, Massachusetts
Overheard by: hb
Ugly teen girl: Don’t compromise your morals! That’s the thing about debate camp. It makes people attractive that you wouldn’t normally find attractive.
–Santa Monica, California
Overheard by: glad I chose soccer camp
