Tourist: Excuse me, are we at the right beach?
Local: Umm…
Tourist: We want to go to the beach where you can see the Golden Gate Bridge.
Local: It’s right there.
Tourist: Where?
Local: Why am I talking to you again?
–San Francisco, California
Tourist: Excuse me, are we at the right beach?
Local: Umm…
Tourist: We want to go to the beach where you can see the Golden Gate Bridge.
Local: It’s right there.
Tourist: Where?
Local: Why am I talking to you again?
–San Francisco, California
20-ish blonde: What time is it in Florida?
–Ocean City, New Jersey
Bimbette: Yeah, I love that show. They show clips from all around the world like Britain and the UK and stuff.
–Pacific Beach, San Diego, California
Overheard by: Sarah
Bedouin girl selling bracelets: Where you from?
Canadian tourist: You are so cute, I am from Canada!
Bedouin girl: Canada dry, never die, Canada dry, never die. You buy bracelet?
–Dahab, Egpyt
Girl, loudly: I need to pee, but I’m still too close to other people.
–Virginia Beach, Virginia
Overheard by: moving away quickly
Little girl staring at a plastic bag washing up on the beach: Ewww! Don’t let that touch me!
Mom: Don’t worry, honey. It can’t hurt you. It’s just a Jersey jellyfish.
–Union Beach, New Jersey
Overheard by: Brian
Girlfriend to boyfriend: Borat was from Kazakhstan–that's a real country!
Boyfriend: No it's not!
Girlfriend: Yes it is, it's over in the Eastern European area! You are so up your ass right now!
–Kaanapali Beach, Maui, Hawaii
Overheard by: Megan
30-Something business dude: I’ve traveled a lot, man, and I’ve been to Costa Rica, and there are no Indians there. Like, people are educated, and there are people with Master’s degrees driving taxi cabs and stuff!
–Golden Gardens, Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Be-deez nuts
Girlfriend: Hey, do you know I heard down in Brazil they, like, mix sand in with their suntan lotion so that it exfoliates their skin?
Boyfriend: That’s fucking stupid.
Girlfriend: Tell me about it! I tried it last year and got a nasty rash. So this year I’m using sand and baby oil.
–Waikiki Beach, Hawaii
Overheard by: Neeri
Blond overtanned guy: Wow, I would rather like to be laying on the beach in Spain right now!
Blond overtanned girl: Yeah, and we could like drive down to Mexico and stuff!
Blond overtanned guy: Hmm…no. You don't drive down to Mexico from Spain…
Blond overtanned girl: Oh! Wrong direction? Is it to the left?
–Nauthólsvík Beach, Iceland
Overheard by: the guy who wishes he wasn't blonde