Geography

Girl: What kind of fish is this?
Waitress: Alaskan cod.
Girl: Do ya’ll catch that around here?
Waitress: Uh, no. [pointing] That’s the Gulf of Mexico.

–Seafood restaurant, Galveston Island, Texas

Chick: So, you live in the city? Wow, where do you live, downtown?
Thug kid: Yeah, downtown… Well, not exactly downtown. Harlem.

–Point Pleasant Beach, New Jersey

Overheard by: alison

Chick #1: So, where are you going for your trip?
Chick #2: Thailand!
Chick #1: Cool! I worked with a guy from Korea once!
Chick #2: Ummm, yeah, that’s not the same, really.
Chick #1: It’s not? Oh… Things must be different now than from when he lived there.

–Pacific Beach, San Diego, California

Overheard by: American Goods

Tourist: So where you from?
Hot girl: Uh, here. Where’d you think I was from?
Tourist: I dunno. It’s just that here, people are always like “Ooh, I’m from Venezuela” and I’m just like, dude, what the fuck is Venezuela?

–Miami Beach, Florida

Old hairy guy: Welcome to the Pacific Ocean!
Dumb blonde: Huh? The ocean? I thought you said we were going to the beach!

–Beverly Beach, Oregon

Overheard by: please tell me she’s kidding

Girl: So, yeah, when I get a bit of money together, I’m going to travel around Europe for bit.
Guy: Oh, yeah, really?
Girl: Yeah, I’m probably going to train around the country for a couple of months.
Guy: Oh, so like to India and stuff, yeah?
Girl: Yeah.

–Melbourne, Australia

Overheard by: Harrison

Guy #1: Oh, shit, I just realized we’re in Tampa!
Guy #2: So?
Guy #1: Tampa!
Guy #2: Oh, bukkake, right?

–St. Petersburg Beach, Florida

Little girl: Mommy, is this Lake Michigan?
Mom: Yes, honey.
Little girl: Then why doesn't it look like this in Chicago?

–Petoskey, Michigan

Little girl: I’m Italian, so I don’t get sick.

–Mashpee, Cape Cod, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Jill

20-Something chick #1: So Brad and I went up to the mountains with his friend Greg and Greg’s fiancé. Brad and Greg went out to unpack the car, and she and I just started going at it.
30-Something chick #2: You guys were making out?
30-Something chick #1: It was way intense.
30-Something chick #2: Wow.
30-Something chick #1: Then Brad and Greg came back in the house, and Greg started, like, totally freaking out. I mean, he just wasn’t, like…feeling my openness!

–San Diego, California

Overheard by: gefiltepez