Girl: I hope nobody stole our towels while we were stealing ice cream.
–Melbourne Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Ali and Livi
Little girl to mom: The seaweed tickles! It's like Baby Jesus is underwater, tickling my feet himself!
–Vero Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Incredulous
Woman: Can I rent a beach chair?
Lifeguard (just off duty on the last day of the season): Fuck you, dumb cunt.
–Panama City Beach, Florida
Little boy: Hey! What’s your name?
Little girl walking along shore doesn’t look at him.
Little boy: Hey! What’s your name?!
Little girl looks at boy but continues walking.
Little boy: What’s your name?! What’s your naaaaame?!
Mother of girl: It’s Jade.
Mother whispers to girl and points in boy’s direction, but girl continues walking in other direction.
Surfer dude: Yeah, kid, you can only expect more of that as you get older.
–Pomano Beach, Florida
Buff dude: Hey, sexy ladies, what’s up?
Girl #1: Not much, just out with my friend and our cat.
Buff dude: You have a cat on the beach?
Girl #2: Of course! People can bring their dogs, can’t they?
Buff dude: Hey, can I pet your pussy?
–St. Petersburg Beach, Florida
Buff dude: Hey, sexy ladies, what’s up?
Girl #1: Not much, just out with my friend and our cat.
Buff dude: You have a cat on the beach?
Girl #2: Of course! People can bring their dogs, can’t they?
Buff dude: Hey, can I pet your pussy?
–St. Petersburg Beach, Florida
JAP #1: So yeah, Aaron* and Rachel* hooked up last night.
JAP #2: Oh my god! What a fucking slut!
JAP #1: Didn’t you and Rachel give Aaron a blow job last week, at the same time?
JAP #2: Yeah, so… Your point?
JAP #1: Oh, nevermind… Just wanted to know what you thought was slutty and what wasn’t.
–Boca Beach Club, Boca Raton, Florida
Overheard by: glad i picked the boca hotel to stay at..
