Drugs

Boy, obviously on drugs: My mum says that your brain is like a forest, and every time you take drugs you are cutting down a tree.

–Splendour Music Festival, Byron Bay, Australia

Girl with lower standards: I think you should go out with Spook. Yeah, I like him for you.
Girl with higher standards: He’s a drug dealer. Why would I want to date a drug dealer?
Girl with lower standards: He’s not a drug dealer.
Girl with higher standards: He sells me weed all the time.
Girl with lower standards: That’s just his part-time job.

–Cabbage Beach, Paradise Island, Bahamas

Dude #1: So, whatever happened to that stripper you were dating?
Dude #2: It’s over. I think it’s a bad idea to date strippers. You realize there’s a good reason they’re strippers, then it fucks it up every time you go back. It’s like, you look at these hotties and imagine all the possibilities, but now, after dating enough strippers, you realize the possibilities include consoling her drunk ass as she cries about being abused as a child while she lines up another rail of coke, then tells you her secret fantasy is to see you get nailed in the ass by another dude!
Dude #1: I still want to date one.
Dude #2: … Yeah, they’re fun.

–LaHaina’s, Mission Beach, California

Overheard by: sean

Girl on drugs, rubbing random person's stomach: Your belly feels like my belly, but on someone else!

–Byron Bay, Australia

Chick #1: Oh my god, look at that Will*! Isn’t he hot? He’s wearing a sweater, and it’s boiling!
Chick #2: Nah, junkies can’t feel.

–St. Kilda Beach, Melbourne, Australia

Overheard by: knee coal

Boy: So you go out a lot?
Girl: Yeah. My sister thinks I’m a druggy, but I’m like, “Sure I take drugs a lot, but that doesn’t make me a druggy.”

–Beach in Australia

Stoner dude: Hey, man, I'm about to get me one a' them blunts!
Stoner friend: Ah! I don't smoke anymore.
Stoner dude: What?! Maaaan, why's everyone gotta be all tired n' shit?

–Santa Cruz, California

Overheard by: Brittany M.

Bro to another: It's the government, bro. They're putting LSD in our oceans.

–Miami Beach, Florida

Overheard by: mar

Stoned chick: So, whenever I’m stoned, like this stoned, I start a sentence… And then through half the sentence, I finish another sentence I said before, or finish another idea in my head, or just start talking. It’s like I forget or something, like, my idea, and it’s like I had it all there, and stuff. You know what I mean?
Stoned guy: … That’s retarded.

–St. Petersburg, Florida