Old black lady finishes pooping and flushes: Oh, thank you, Jesus! [Hums gospel tune.]
–Miami Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Lauren
Old black lady finishes pooping and flushes: Oh, thank you, Jesus! [Hums gospel tune.]
–Miami Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Lauren
Guy on cell: That was the first time I shit my pants in a while!
–Salem, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Laura Wilson
Little girl, very afraid of the toilet: No!
Girl's frustrated mother: Go to the bathroom. It's not going to hurt you. I promise!
Girl: No!
Mother: Please! I'll be standing right here. Nothing will happen.
Girl: No no no no no!
Mother: Goddammit, Kylie! You can't hold you poop in forever!
–Newport Beach, California
Overheard by: Millie
Little boy: Ew, dad! Look! Dog poo!
Father: No, I think that's bat poo.
Little boy: Batman's poo?
–Byron Bay, Australia
Guy #1: Dude, but she is so annoying.
Guy #2: Yeah I know what you mean, but what else can you do?
Guy #1: I dunno, dude, but I’m not gonna take a shit on her. That’s freaking weird! I’m not into that!
Guy #2: Yeah, I guess.
–Manasquan Inlet Beach, New Jersey
Mother: Remember: when you have to use the bathroom at the beach, you go in the water, right?
Toddler: Okay, mommy.
–East Hampton, New York
Overheard by: I'll never swim again
Mother: Remember: when you have to use the bathroom at the beach, you go in the water, right?
Toddler: Okay, mommy.
–East Hampton, New York
Overheard by: I'll never swim again
College chick eating chocolate rice pudding: It kinda looks like poop, but it’s so yummy!
Drunk girl: Don’t eat poop. It’s not good for you.
–Majesty of the Seas cruise ship
Mother to young child: Do you hear the ship, honey?
Child: No, mommy, I don't.
Mother: Do you feel the ship moving?
Child: Yes! I feel my shit moving.
–Carnival Freedom Cruise, Caribbean Sea
Overheard by: InTheNextStall
