Gripes

Little boy: I can’t believe we went under. I still have that taste in my mouth!
Dad: Get used to it. You’ll be tasting that your whole life.

–Horseneck Beach, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Kp & Cd

Vendor: Hey, buy some pizza!
Chick: I don’t like bread.
Vendor: Then just eat the cheese!
Chick: I’m lactose-intolerant.
Vendor: Fro-zen yo-gurt!

–Venice Beach, California

Young boy: Your uncle peed on Mikey last night!

–Santa Monica Pier, Santa Monica, California

Girl: Well, you get like half his money when you divorce!…And he’s in med school now. Alls I’m sayin’ is you should wait a few years.

–Folly Beach, South Carolina

Big mama in bathroom stall with daughter: Hurry up and pee!
Young girl: Mommy, I can’t pee with other people around!
Big mama: Honey, if and when you go to jail, you gonna hafta pee in front of other people.

–Scarborough Beach, Rhode Island

Overheard by: Riley

Woman, watching animal abuse commercial on Logo: I hate this commercial. This is why I don't watch this channel. Well, this and all the gays.

–West Palm Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Enjoys the gays

Girl: You have to take your shoes off to walk in the sand.
Guy: I’ll wait until we find a spot.
Girl: What? Walking in the sand with your shoes is like fucking your mom and not cleaning up afterwards.
Guy: Okay, okay!

–Jones Beach, New York

Overheard by: JD

A black man cuts in line ahead of two anorexic JAPs.

Anorexic JAP #1: Why are we here again?
Anorexic JAP #2: Ugh, I know! This would never happen back in Boca!
Black man: Eat something, you Jewish popsicles!
Anorexic JAP #1: Did he just ask us to give him a blowjob?

–Deerfield Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Laughing

Tween girl to parents: You never listen to me!
Mom: Be quiet, Ashley.

–Clearwater Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Nicole

Tween girl to parents: You never listen to me!
Mom: Be quiet, Ashley.

–Clearwater Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Nicole