Diet and Weight

Fat half-naked lady, walking up to a random lady and her kid: I'm about to burst!

–Cocoa Beach, Florida

Overheard by: would not like to be there when it happens

Woman to husband, pointing at fat girl: Is she pregnant?
Husband: I don't know.
Woman: I'll ask Beth, Beth knows everything.

–Centennial Beach, British Columbia, Canadia

20-something girl: Guys, did you see the man in the woman's swimsuit over there?
Teen girl #1: Yeah, yeah, I saw him…
20-something girl: He has man legs…
Teen girl #1: But from a distance he could totally pass as a flat chick.
20-something girl: He can really pull it off, too. He has the hat and the glasses and everything.
Teen girl #2: Where's the tranny man? I want to see the tranny man!

–La Jolla, California

Overheard by: La Jollan

Heavy sweaty chick, yelling across store at friends: My sweat smells like beer!

–Surf Shop, Laguna Beach, California

Preggers: They really shouldn’t let fat people go here. It’s disgusting with their stomachs all poking and out and shit. At least make them wear a shirt!
Other chick: You’re seven months pregnant and wearing a bikini. Doesn’t that include you, too?
Preggers: Shut up, bitch. Of course I don’t count. Guys dig sexy pregnant women.

–Ocean City, Maryland

Overheard by: Glynnis O

Biotech #1: Wow. Did you see his new girlfriend over there?
Biotech #2: Yeah. She’s got cottage cheese legs.
Bimbette: Really? Where is she? Is she fat?
Biotech #2: It’s not that she’s fat, it’s just that… well… she’s built like a linebacker.
Bimbette, looking in opposite direction: Hey, look — volleyball!

–Hamburg Beach, Germany

Drinking dude: He was a cool guy until he pissed in the closet.

–Long Beach, New York

Beach-goer: Belly rings and stretch marks really don’t go together.

–Redondo Beach, California

Overheard by: Everybody’s Ex-Wife

Loud high school girl: I was walking down the beach and I saw this girl with the fattest vagina! It was like balls!

–Good Harbor Beach, Gloucester, Massachusetts