Toddler: Mom, we are the hermit crabs that are going to change the world.
–Monterey, California
Toddler: Mom, we are the hermit crabs that are going to change the world.
–Monterey, California
16-year-old girl holding sand crab: Look! I found a frog… or something.
–Seaside Heights, New Jersey
Overheard by: Ashley
Girl: I'm really allergic to bugs, so that's why I'm scared of jellyfish.
–Destin, Florida
Overheard by: right, because jellyfish are just really big bugs
Redneck, looking at fish tank: How many of them there fish you reckon I could shoot?
–Ripley's Aquarium, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Overheard by: Lost all hope in humanity
Little girl: If a pig spits in your eye, you'll get the flu.
–Takapuna Beach, Auckland, New Zealand
Bimbette tourist #1, about sea lions play-fighting: Oh my god, look at those seals! That big one just, like, knocked the smaller one off the wood thing!
Bimbette tourist #2: That is so mean. I hope the little one, like, kicks his ass in the end.
Local: They’re just play-fighting. It’s a show of dominance.
Bimbette tourist #1: But he pushed him off! He so wasn’t kidding. I could tell.
Bimbette tourist #2: Seriously. God, how can you just excuse him acting like that? Not cool.
Local, muttering: Fucking tourists…
–Fisherman’s Wharf, San Francisco, California
Overheard by: an amused local
Girl to friends: You know what tastes great? Scrambled chicken abortions…
–Tampa, Florida
Boundary-Conscious chick: Oh my God, why is that seagull here? I thought this was a private beach!
–Westhampton Beach, New York
