Guy to girl: I'm going set up booby traps round your house!
Girl to guy: Oooh, booby traps, I like the sound of that…
–Tampa, Florida
Little girl: Lifeguard! Lifeguard! What do crabs eat?
Lifeguard: Little girls.
–Riis Park, New York
Teen girl: I heard there are sharks in the lake.
Teen boy: That’s probably not true.
Teen girl: It’s true. Like, somebody got killed here by a shark.
Teen boy: I think you have upstate New York confused with anywhere with a shoreline.
Teen girl: But…
Teen boy: ‘But’-nothing if you wanna get fucked later.
–Lake George, New York
Teen girl: Do sea lions swim?
Mom: No, they ride boats.
–Santa Cruz, California
Overheard by: just wanted to take a look at SEA LIONS
Teen girl: What'cha doing, dad?
Father: Staring at the cow.
Teen girl (looking ahead): Where?
Father: In the water.
Teen girl (frantically looking at the sea): Where?!
Father: In my imagination.
–Miami Beach, Florida
Overheard by: amused book-reader
Hot teen girl #1: Sexy llama come to mama. (throws imaginary lasso)
Hot teen girl #2 (caught in the imaginary lasso): Unce unce unce unce…yes.
Random lady to son nearby: See honey, this is why we don't eat magical mushrooms.
–Rehoboth Beach, Deleware
Overheard by: kevin
Dude: When I was in Florida, there was a dolphin in the water about five feet from me. I never ran so fast in my life.
Chick: Why?
Dude: When something big and black surfaces next to you in the water, you generally start to shit your pants.
–North Burleigh Beach, Australia
Overheard by: Galina
Drunk girl, rolling around in large puddle: It’s a bird bath! Get in!
Angry guy: Get the fuck out of the puddle! You’re not a goddamn bird!
–Bayard Avenue, Dewey Beach, Delaware
Daughter: Mom, why do you have to go to the bathroom already? We just went a few minutes ago!
Mother: I don't know… I guess I'm like a dog, I have to leave my scent everywhere…
–Sandy Hook, New Jersey
Daughter: Mom, why do you have to go to the bathroom already? We just went a few minutes ago!
Mother: I don't know… I guess I'm like a dog, I have to leave my scent everywhere…
–Sandy Hook, New Jersey
