You Know She Likes Fish

Hot chick #1 (laying on Little Mermaid towel): I always feel bad laying on her like this.
Hot chick #2: I wouldn’t! I’d scissor her face if she was real.

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Posted on February 11, 2026
Girls, Movies, Stupidity, Threats, Violence, Virginia

Making Me the Perfect Complement to Any Outfit

College kid: But I was conceived in Florida, so that means I'm neutral!

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Posted on November 30, 2025
Geography, Students, Stupidity, Virginia

…Is the Title Of My New Documentary.

Guy at table full of intently listening people: Imagine 50 pounds of animal defecating inside your house! That's a lot of shit!

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Posted on November 2, 2025
Animals, Diet and Weight, Guys, Poop, Virginia, Weirdness

…While You're Sleeping.

Drunk guy to drunk friends: I love you from the base of my penis!

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Overheard by: Allison

Posted on October 16, 2025
Drunks, Feelings, Friends, Penis, Virginia, Weirdness

…While You're Sleeping.

Drunk guy to drunk friends: I love you from the base of my penis!

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Overheard by: Allison

Posted on October 15, 2025
Drunks, Feelings, Friends, Penis, Virginia, Weirdness

…We've Demuzed Ourselves with This Conversation Long Enough.

Girl #1: Yeah, it's totally going to be my de-mice.
Girl #2: De-mice?
Girl #1: De-meese?
Girl #2: What? Demise?
Girl #1: Whatever.

–Virginia Beach

Posted on October 15, 2025
Girls, Questions, Stupidity, Virginia, Words

No, Let's Talk More about the Cheese

Woman: Where are you from?
Twelve-year-old boy: Minnesota.
Woman: Oh, yeah, you have really good cheese there.
Boy: Ummmm…
Woman: Oh, wait. No. That’s Wisconsin. They have really good cheese.
Boy: Yeah. They do. But I’m from Minnesota.

–Virginia Beach