Woman sitting at beach with friends: I saw a ladybug in my salad and I ate that shit! It was giving me the finger…
–Riis Beach, New York
Little sister: Bury me! Bury me!
Big brother: No, I can’t marry you. That’d be disgusting.
Little sister: BURY me!
Big brother: No, no, I can’t marry you! Stop it!
Little sister: I said BURY me, stupid!
–Orchard Beach, New York
Overheard by: Anais Borg-Marks
Chick #1: So like, I shaved my legs and then went to this party and there was this toootally hot guy there, but he didn’t want to hook up with me.
Chick #2: Well, I have this theory that you only get action when your legs are hairy.
–The Hamptons, New York
Lady in long line for bathroom: Why you wanna change in there when you got sand up your ass?
–Boardwalk, Coney Island, New York
Lifeguard: Yo! The beach ain't no good! I said the beach ain't no good today! (sees attractive woman walking toward the beach) Hey there, listen, the beach isn't good today, okay?
–Coney Island, New York
Overheard by: Nikki
Boy, about people stepping on crabs: Looks like I'm not the only one with crab problems.
–Jones Beach, New York
Girl: It's funny, when I first met you, you were a virgin, and now you fuck everybody!
Guy, whining: Shut up!
–Smith Point, Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Tom and Katie
Scrabble girl #1: Rasheeon?
Scrabble girl #2: It’s “ration.”
Scrabble girl #1: I don’t think that’s a word.
Scrabble girl #2: Come on! You know, like in Cambodia, you get your daily food rations.
Scrabble girl #1: You can’t use Cambodian words.
–Long Beach, New York
Overheard by: Andrew
Guy to friend, in thick New York accent: Let's go on the cyclone and get the fuck outta here!
–Coney Island
Overheard by: Preston