Little boy: What’s a ‘shindig’?
Mom: It’s like a party.
Little boy: Oh, okay.
Mom: It’s like a big, southern party. In Texas. Yee-haw!
Little boy: Yee-haw?
–Lake Michigan, Holland, Michigan
Overheard by: BAB
Foreign single father: So, are you guys having fun at the beach?
Son: Actually, yeah — it’s fun.
Foreign single father: Next time, have positive attitude from the start.
Son: No, that was ’cause before when you said, ‘Let’s go to the beach,’ I thought we were gonna visit Mom.
–Lake Erie, Ontario, Canadia
Overheard by: native english speaker
Preteen boy #1, whispering to pal: Dude! Look at that girl lying over there. Her bikini’s pulled up so tight it’s up in her snatch.
Preteen boy #2, whispering back: Quiet… Damn!
Preteen boy #1: What’s that sticking out?
Preteen boy #2: I think it’s hair, dude.
Preteen boy #1: They got hair down there?
[they high-five each other]Preteen boy #1: It’s kind of gross and cool at the same time.
–Padre Island, Texas
Four-year-old to 12-year-old: You come over here every single day. No one likes you. Go back to your own camp.
–Lake Champlain, New York
Little boy: Daddy, look what I found in the sand!
Father: Don’t touch it. I don’t know what it is, but don’t touch it.
–Jungle Gym, Coney Island Beach, New York
Little girl: Daddy, can I kick the birds?
Dad: No.
Little girl: Why not?
Dad: Birds are nice!
–Santa Monica, California
Brooklyn kid pointing to training buoys: What are those big red things floating out there?
Lifeguard: Oh, that’s our shark fence.
Brooklyn kid: What?!
Lifeguard: Yeah, that’s our electric shark fence. It keeps the sharks out. Unless they were already in when we put it up — then they are stuck inside.
–New Jersey
Boy to girl, behind trees: I’m running out of things to put in there!
–St. George Island, Florida
Overheard by: Shocked and disturbed
