Teenage girl to boyfriend: Ew, look. Haley is over there. Whore. She comes here like every day with nothing better to do.
Boyfriend: We come here every day, too.
Teenage girl: Yeah but at least we like, have friends.
–Miami Beach, Florida
Teenage girl to boyfriend: Ew, look. Haley is over there. Whore. She comes here like every day with nothing better to do.
Boyfriend: We come here every day, too.
Teenage girl: Yeah but at least we like, have friends.
–Miami Beach, Florida
Chick #1: You were a complete whore last night.
Chick #2: Look who’s talking! Do I have to mention the time you let Derek go down on you?
Chick #1: Bitch! That guy over there can hear you!
Chick #2: So what?
Chick #1: Listen to how you’re talking about me and my brother. He’s gonna think I’m a complete skank!
Chick #2: I said Derek. He didn’t know who the fuck Derek was until you opened your fuckin’ mouth.
Chick #1: Uh, yeah, I guess you’re right…
–Panama City Beach, Florida
Overheard by: That guy over there
Girl on cell: Yeah, so my dad said he wouldn’t pay for college, but he would pay for my wedding, and I’d rather have a big party than study stupid shit for four years, so I’ll just do that…
–Marathon, Florida
Overheard by: Nicole
Older lady #1: You know they have a hot stone massage?
Older lady #2: Really?
Older lady #1: Yeah! It sounds really nice.
Older lady #2: Maybe we should get them! Then we can get shirts that say “I got stoned in Miami”
Older lady #1, laughing: We could.
Older lady #2: No, but I actually want to get them and wear that shirt.
–Elemis Spa, Miami Beach, Florida
Chick: You didn’t bring the towels?!
Dude: Sorry, I forgot! Just lay in the sand!
Chick: I can’t! You know it always gets up inside of me!
–Daytona Beach, Florida
Fat half-naked lady, walking up to a random lady and her kid: I'm about to burst!
–Cocoa Beach, Florida
Overheard by: would not like to be there when it happens
Daughter: You’re sticking out, mom.
Mother: What’s sticking out?
Daughter: Your pubic hair.
Mother: Is it gray?
Daughter: Um, no, not really.
Mother: I’m gonna take a nap.
–Destin, Florida
Overheard by: Hard not to laugh out loud
Obnoxious blonde instructor to riding student: That was beautiful! It looked like water ballet!
–Horse Show, West Palm Beach, Florida
Tan chick on towel: So, I was like, ‘And what about the donkeys? Like, do they enjoy sex like we do?’
Pale fat chick next to her: I would guess so. I mean, I had a friend who sucked one off one time, so why not?
–Clearwater Beach, Florida
Overheard by: …what?
Worried teen: Oh no! The janitor lady cleaned up my tooth!
–Howard Park Beach, Tarpon Springs, Florida
Overheard by: CorLiz
