Tourist: How do they get the sand so white? Do they bleach it or something?
Local: We wash it every day.
–Tulum, Mexico
Overheard by: Tulumbum
Hobo to lifeguard: Yeah, I pooped here. Twice, actually. Once right there, and once right there.
–Pacifica, California
- Posted on
- California, Health & Hygiene, Homeless, Poop, Swimming
Son (looking at man in Speedo): Mom! Look at that man! He's wearing a bikini without a top!
–Long Island, New York
Girl on cell: Hey! I was wondering when you’re picking me up… Oh… Okay… Well, yeah, I’m not as exciting as getting fucked. I’d ditch me too. Okay, call me tomorrow!
–Queen’s Quay, Toronto, Canadia
Overheard by: Laura
- Posted on
- Canadia, Compare and contrast, Girls, On the phone, Sex
Female tourist: So, how do they know where the islands are every day?
Male tourist: They’re chained to the sea floor so they don’t drift too far.
–Cinnamon Bay, St. John, U.S. Virgin Islands
Overheard by: stephen
- Posted on
- Questions, Tourists, Virgin Islands
Little boy: My daddy isn’t here.
Girl #1: He isn’t here? Where is he?
Little boy: In the garbage.
Girl #2: Why is he in the garbage?
Little boy: He is in the garbage.
Girl #1: Why?
Little boy: Because he doesn’t like my Skechers.
–Cocoa Beach, Florida
Overheard by: megan
Little boy: If I was a girl, I would marry my cousin.
–Palm City, Florida
Overheard by: MD
Little girl, crying: He’s not coming! He said he was going to come, and now he’s not coming!
Apathetic, topless, overly-tan mom: Go home. Eat something.
–Palavas-les-Flots, France (translated from French)
Overheard by: Christine
Bikini girl #1: Oh my god, he was totally sleeping, and his member was, like, totally awake. Like, hello?!
Bikini girl #2, giggling: Yeah, hello?!
Bikini girl #3, giggling: Hello?!
–Seaside Heights, New Jersey
Tattooed woman with cast: Did you see the dancer on stage with the horse tail?
Pale friend: I am ready for a vacation.
–South Beach, Florida
Overheard by: Scott on SoBe