Crackhead: Yeah, I’m kind of known around here as the sheriff of the North Shore.
Local guy: Yeah? Well, then I’m the mayor.
Passing Australian surfer: I want to be prime minister.
–Sunset Beach, Oahu, Hawaii
Overheard by: Jehan
Girl #1: Dude, my retainer smells nasty!
Girl #2: Just put a little bleach on it.
Girl #1: Wouldn't that kill me?
Girl #2: Yeah, but it will make your teeth whiter.
–Tampa, Florida
- Posted on
- Body parts, Florida, Girls, Health & Hygiene, Questions, Sensory Experiences
Tourist guy: I hate these tourists! They think they’re so cool, just coming down for the weekend in their little homes, fucking up the traffic and making parking difficult. Go home!
Local teen: Your license plate says you’re from Pennsylvania.
Tourist guy: I rent for the summer. I guess I’m kinda like you, in a sense.
Local teen: Bitch, please.
–Bethany Beach, Delaware
Overheard by: beach native
Canadian girl to Americans: Oh my god! You guys speak Canadian? We’ve been looking for other people who speak Canadian!
American guy: Yup, only Canadian. No American or English. Only Canadian.
Canadian girl: Awesome! Me, too!
–Punta Cana, Dominican Republic
- Posted on
- Canadia, Caribbean, Dominican Republic, Idiots, Stupidity
Little kid to mom, as storm is coming: If thunder claps while you're in the water, you're gonna die!
–Pawley's Island, South Carolina
Overheard by: Running for Cover
- Posted on
- Death, Moms, Nature, Should've used a condom, South Carolina, Swimming, Weather, Weirdness
Spanish teen: Yo, mami, how ’bout I take a picture of me and you with that camera?
Preppy chick: How ’bout you’re not touching my camera?
Spanish teen: Oh, ouch! I’ll let you hold my phone. It’s worth lots!
Preppy chick: This camera is probably worth more than you are to your own mother.
–Bayfront Beach, Hamilton, Ontario, Canadia
Mother, holding one son in the ocean and calling another on shore: See? The water's fantastic. You have nothing to worry about.
Four-year-old son, crying: I don't want to die here!
–Palm Beach, Aruba
Blonde girl #1: I got a fucking DUI last night, can you believe that shit?
Blonde girl #2: Well, you *were* pretty drunk last night…
Blonde girl #1: So? Everyone else was, too!
Blonde girl #2: Yeah, but they weren't driving around everywhere.
–Isla Vista beach, Santa Barbara, California
Overheard by: just trying to study
- Posted on
- California, Drinking, Girls, Insults
Girl, carrying piece of kelp to dad: This can be my pet until we get a doggie!
–Hermosa Beach, California
Tall blonde: That's fantastic, he seems really great!
Short brunette: You know what I love most about him? He gets me… I mean he really appreciates my sluttiness!
–World Pie, Bridgehampton, New York
- Posted on
- Compliments, Girls, New York, Relationships, Sex
