It’s Nev­er Too Ear­ly for In­ter­net Porn

Lit­tle boy: Hey! What’s your name?

Lit­tle girl walk­ing along shore does­n’t look at him.

Lit­tle boy: Hey! What’s your name?!

Lit­tle girl looks at boy but con­tin­ues walk­ing.

Lit­tle boy: What’s your name?! What’s your naaaaame?!
Moth­er of girl: It’s Jade.

Moth­er whis­pers to girl and points in boy’s di­rec­tion, but girl con­tin­ues walk­ing in oth­er di­rec­tion.

Surfer dude: Yeah, kid, you can on­ly ex­pect more of that as you get old­er.

–Po­mano Beach, Flori­da

She Wan­dered In­to a For­eign Film Fes­ti­val at the Bi­jou

Teen girl #1: Have you been go­ing to church late­ly?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, I found a new church I re­al­ly like.
Teen girl #1: Re­al­ly?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, it like smells all creepy, and, like, they speak in tongues. It is re­al­ly scary, so I will prob­a­bly go to this one!
Teen girl #1: Cool. Maybe I’ll go with you.

–Shils­hole Beach, Seat­tle, Wash­ing­ton

Over­heard by: Why do those peo­ple have goatskins on?

He Finds You

Kid #1: Ma­ma, have you seen the bad guy?
Mom: Not to­day.
Kid #1: Is he here?
Mom: I don’t think so, no.
Kid #2: Where is he?
Mom: Well, if you don’t look for him, you’re not gonna find him!

–Mal­ibu, Cal­i­for­nia

Over­heard by: Jes­si­ca B.