Drunk guy to others: Imagine how long it would take to fuck a spider. It would take ages!
–Dunedin, New Zealand
- Posted on September 22, 2023
- Animals, Drunks, New Zealand, Sex, Time
Bedouin girl selling bracelets: Where you from?
Canadian tourist: You are so cute, I am from Canada!
Bedouin girl: Canada dry, never die, Canada dry, never die. You buy bracelet?
–Dahab, Egpyt
- Posted on September 21, 2023
- Geography, Middle East, Questions, Tourists, Vendors
Guy #1: Do you like movies?
Guy #2: Movies? Oh yeah, movies!
–Huntington Beach, California
Overheard by: tori
- Posted on September 21, 2023
- California, Guys, Movies, Questions, Stupidity
Teen girl to friend: If you don't stop, I will punch you in the tits.
–Pacifica, California
- Posted on September 20, 2023
- Biotechs, California, Insults, Rack, Violence
Southern belle: If I had gotten on that boat, I would have met the man of my dreams. We would have had an amazing time and I would have fallen madly in love. Then I'd go back to Arkansas and he'd forget about me, just like all the rest of them.
Friend: Yeah… Need a smoke?
Southern belle: Yes! Do you have menthol? I love menthol.
–Fort Myers Beach, Florida
- Posted on September 20, 2023
- Feelings, Florida, Friends, Girls, Offers and requests, Relationships, Smoking
Amateur marine biologist #1: Why are they called jellyfish?
Amateur marine biologist #2: They taste like jelly. Duh.
Amateur marine biologist #1: Blueberry jelly?
Amateur marine biologist #2: I dunno. Taste it.
Amateur marine biologist #1, moments later: Cherry.
–Chesapeake Bay
Hot tan girl reading specials board: Does that say tuna and Jews?
Hot pale girl: Um, no. That says “with chips.”
–Crazy Gringo, Weirs Beach, New Hampshire
Drunk guy: Dude, which way is the beach?!
Sober friend: We’re on an island! You figure it out!
–South Padre Island, Texas
Man on cell: I know — she’s been a proper cunt since she got cancer.
–Freshwater West, Pembroke, Wales
Overheard by: Withy
- Posted on September 18, 2023
- Gossip, On the phone, UK
Girl #1: Do you think a guy would tell you if he had a girlfriend?
Girl #2: Yes, of course he would!
–Belmar, New Jersey
Overheard by: kate
- Posted on September 17, 2023
- Friends, Girls, New Jersey, Questions, Stupidity, Three is company