Food

Stoned girl #1: You know what's awesome? If you look up, you see the moon and the stars, and it's like you're looking at space.
Stoned girl #2 (munching Parmesan crackers): Whoooaaa.

–Saint Petersburg, Florida

Overheard by: i was stoned and it sounded cool at the time, too.

Waitress: Do you want cheddar, mozzarella, or Swiss on your burger?
Customer: Um… American?

–The Purple Parrot, Rehoboth Beach, Delaware

Overheard by: Hollywood

Queer #1: Oh my god, I used to eat Little Debbies all the time! I would have a Little Debbie and a Coke for breakfast every day.
Queer #2, intensely: I fucking loved Little Debbies.

–Publix, South Beach, Miami, Florida

Teen girl #1: Pick a vegetable!
Teen girl #2: I know mine — tomato!
Teen girl #3: Dumbass, a tomato’s a fruit. Choose again.
Teen girl #2: Ginger!
Teen girl #1: Should I pick an easier category?

–Emerald Isle, North Carolina

Mother: Honey, do you want some cheddar cheese Pringles?
Kid: Sure.
Mother: See, they have zero grams trans fat. That’s really important now.

–Bradley Beach, Jersey Shore, New Jersey

Teen girl on cell: It doesn't have feces in it?

–Malibu, California

Girl #1: It tastes like soap!
Girl #2: Yeah, but not unpleasantly so.

–Adelaide, Australia

Girl #1: Oh wow, you got so many freckles today!
Guy: Why does everyone keep saying that? Do freckles come from the sun or something?
Girl #2: Um… yeah?
Guy: I just kinda thought they showed up. Like sometimes they're here, and sometimes they're not.
Girl #1: Um, no, it's not random. Like, I ate some cheese, so now I'm freckled.
Girl #2: Or, I'm really freckled cuz I'm tired.

–Paradise Beach, Mykonos, Greece

Overheard by: Jules

Spring break girl #1, holding cereal: I think I’ll have this for breakfast.
Spring break girl #2: I’m having alcohol for breakfast.
Spring break girl #1, putting cereal back: Oooh, good idea!

–Panama City Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Lsquared

Walrusy pink tourist mom, juggling McDonald's bags and towels: Are those seagulls following us?
Dancing pink tourist toddler: I want hanka burger and French-ah fries!
(seagulls swoop over them, attacking the bags)
Dancing pink tourist, shrieking: Oh my god! My French-ah fries!

–St. Peterburg Beach, Florida

Overheard by: Sandy Paws