Bimbettes

Teen girl: Of course she will get naked, she is slutty… I will get naked too, next time, but you guys respect me, right? Oh look, there’s a nude dude… [Points at stranger.] Want to see if I can get him hard?

–Sandy Hook, New Jersey

Blonde: … So as soon as we got home from spring break I told my boyfriend that I had sex with Brad on the beach.
Friend: Oh my gosh! What did your boyfriend do?!
Blonde: He said, ‘I guess we’re not riding in Brad’s limo for prom.’
Friend: What’s wrong with Brad’s limo?!

–St. Augustine beach, Florida

Bimbo #1, happily: It's so thick!
Bimbo #2, wide-eyed: Did you slap it?
Bimbo #1: No, I poked it.

–Virginia Beach, Virginia

Overheard by: Emmy

Pilot on PA: We’ll be making our final descent to Oahu International Airport shortly.
Blonde cheerleader: Oh my god! I thought we were going to Honolulu!
9-year-old boy nearby: Honolulu is the city on Oahu, you idiot.
Blonde cheerleader: Oh… Well, how am I supposed to know that?

–Plane to Hawaii

Overheard by: Derek

Blonde girl: Oh… I had sex with your brother last night.
Brunette girl: Oh, yeah?
Blonde girl: He has a huge cock.
Brunette girl: Oh my god! I know!
Blonde girl: Too bad he has herpes.
Brunette girl: I know…

–Burlington Beach, Ontario, Canadia

Overheard by: Alrighty…..

Blonde walking on pier: I am not ditzy! Ask me a question.
Brunette: Uh, which way is West?
Blonde: That’s a trick question.

–Huntington Beach, California

Teenybopper #1: Ew, I hate wide open spaces.
Teenybopper #2: Isn’t there a word for that?
Teenybopper #1: Yeah, I think it’s some kind of phobia or something.

–Huntington Beach, California

Overheard by: MarilynMonBRO

Ditz #1: I would love to be a Buddhist.
Ditz #2: Yeah, it’s really spiritual.
Ditz #1: Yeah, all the meditating and stuff…
Ditz #2: Yeah…
Ditz #1: … But not a full Buddhist — that would be boring.
Ditz #2: Yeah, just do it for the yoga and stuff.

–Jetty Road, Glenelg, Australia

Bimbette #1: I’m so bored.
Bimbette #2: Me, too.
Bimbette #1: I would eat my own hand just for some fun.

–North Sea, Holland

Late-20s chick #1: Don’t the tourists understand the laws of seagull shitting? I mean, if they feed them, they are going to crap all over the entire beach.
Late-20s chick #2: At least the parade of Hare Krishnas has passed.

–Jacksonville Beach, Florida

Overheard by: unMuse